Too Much

Which side of your brain do you use the most?

2008-03-14T12:29:00.004-05:00

Which way do you see her spinning?

If you are seeing this lady spinning clockwise, then it means you are using the right side of the brain. If you are seeing her spinning counter-clockwise, then you are using the left side of the brain.

Some people are able to see her spinning in both directions, but most of them see her rotating only in one. If you can see her spin in one directions and then make her spin in the other, then you are a part of a handful of people.

Even if it might not seem so, both directions can be seen. Apparently, this fact has been proven at Yale University, after 5 years of studying the human brain and its functions. Supposedly only 14% of the US population can see her spinning in both directions.

I see her spinning clockwise, so I’m using the right side of my brain which makes sense, because I’m left handed.

Selected Quotes of James Madison

2007-10-26T17:02:00.000-05:00

A pure democracy is a society consisting of a small number of citizens, who assemble and administer the government in person.

A well regulated militia, composed of the body of the people, trained in arms, is the best most natural defense of a free country.

All men having power ought to be mistrusted.

As a man is said to have a right to his property, he may be equally said to have a property in his rights.

Do not separate text from historical background. If you do, you will have perverted and subverted the Constitution, which can only end in a distorted, bastardized form of illegitimate government.

I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments by those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations.

If men were angels, no government would be necessary.

If Tyranny and Oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy.

It is a universal truth that the loss of liberty at home is to be charged to the provisions against danger, real or pretended, from abroad.

It will be of little avail to the people that the laws are made by men of their own choice if the laws be so voluminous that they cannot be read, or so incoherent that they cannot be understood.

Knowledge will forever govern ignorance; and a people who mean to be their own governors must arm themselves with the power which knowledge gives.

Learned Institutions ought to be favorite objects with every free people. They throw that light over the public mind which is the best security against crafty and dangerous encroachments on the public liberty.

Liberty may be endangered by the abuse of liberty, but also by the abuse of power.

No nation could preserve its freedom in the midst of continual warfare.

Of all the enemies of public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded, because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

Such democracies have ever been spectacles of turbulence and contention; have ever been found incompatible with personal security or the rights of property; and have in general been as short in their lives as they have been violent in their deaths.

The advancement and diffusion of knowledge is the only guardian of true liberty.

The Constitution of the United States was created by the people of the United States composing the respective states, who alone had the right.

The Constitution preserves the advantage of being armed which Americans possess over the people of almost every other nation where the governments are afraid to trust the people with arms.

The diversity in the faculties of men, from which the rights of property originate, is not less an insuperable obstacle to an uniformity of interests. The protection of these faculties is the first object of government.

The essence of Government is power; and power, lodged as it must be in human hands, will ever be liable to abuse.

The executive has no right, in any case, to decide the question, whether there is or is not cause for declaring war.

The loss of liberty at home is to be charged to the provisions against danger, real or imagined, from abroad.

The means of defense against foreign danger historically have become the instruments of tyranny at home.

The proposed Constitution is, in strictness, neither a national nor a federal constitution; but a composition of both.

The purpose of separation of church and state is to keep forever from these shores the ceaseless strife that has soaked the soil of Europe with blood for centuries.

We are right to take alarm at the first experiment upon our liberties.

What is government itself but the greatest of all reflections on human nature? If men were angels, no government would be necessary. If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary.

What prudent merchant will hazard his fortunes in any new branch of commerce when he knows not that his plans may be rendered unlawful before they can be executed?

22 Confessions Of A Former Dell Sales Manager

2007-06-15T16:31:00.000-05:00

www.consumerist.com

A former Dell kiosk manager writes us to share helpful tips about doing business with Dell. He has no particular problems with Dell, he just wanted to share some helpful tips for consumers looking to get the best deal. He includes info on getting the best deal from the website, different kinds of promotions the Dell offers, insider details on how the kiosk sales reps are compensated, what coupons and deals they have to offer you to close the deal, the email format for Dell in case you're thinking of launching an EECB, where to take your Dell credit card complaints, which extended warranties to avoid, how to get a domestic tech support rep... and more. It's very comprehensive. Enjoy!

I am a former Spherion rep that later became a Dell Branded Rep (manager) of a Dell kiosk in the Philadelphia, PA region. To work at one is to work at all, and I worked at four different kiosks in the region. I worked from July 2005 until October 2006, but keep regular contact with some of the guys I trained and brought up. Other than the usual complaints, I have no problem with the company.

Things most people know already:

1. Small business is better than home and home office - Small business typically runs a few dollars more than the home office, but you stand a better chance of getting domestic tech support rather than non-native English speakers. As an added perk, small business promotions are occasionally better than home.

2. Play with the web site - There are many different pricing packages for the same product throughout the various sections, typically three or more per segment. If you're buying a Dell soon, configure a unit from a link off the main page, from the product listing on the drop down and from the "As Advertised-Newspaper" drop down. Configure the same system each way at the home, small business and the Direct (kiosk) site (http://www.dell.com/directstore). It is very likely you will end up with nine different prices.

3. Extended warranty for laptops - Do it for as long as you feasibly see using your laptop, and include accidental. Two years is typically the lifecycle from "new product" to "no longer produced/no more refurbs" though YMMV. Once your model is off the refurb site, drop it. Voila! New laptop. The standard warranty will not cover any screen defects.

UPDATE: Current Dell rep says: If a system is no longer shipping a used/refurbished is always sent, though the refurb should be equal or better as far as hardware is concerned. As of this writing if a system is exchanged, via either Complete Care warranty or concession, and the system is still a currently shipping model a new system is to be sent.

4. Extended warranty for desktops - There is nothing in a low end desktop (non XPS) that is worth the price of the warranty should you have to replace it. Only pick it up if you have absolutely no clue what you're doing once the case is open.

5. Tech support phone - If you do go with the home/home office/direct route, tech support is outsourced (duh!). The tech support instant messenger typically provides a calmer, more understandable conversation due to the fact that accents are taken out of the equation. Think back to high school Spanish. It was always easier to translate the foreign language you were reading than if you heard it. Same concept applies here.

6. Tech support web site - If you're having a common problem, hit the product forums (however crippled they may be now). It is very likely your question/problem has been resolved before, and usually a domestic tech rep posted a solution there.

7. Warranty Repairs - On all but the two lowest warranties (90 day and 1 year limited), warranty repairs will be done in the home. The repair techs are only required to replace the broken part. They are not required to do anything else. If they replace your hard drive, they are not required to reinstall your OS or drivers. Most will do it if you're nice, but don't expect it. If you're clueless, there are tutorials all over http://support.dell.com that tell you how to do it yourself.

UPDATE: Current Dell rep says: Also with desktop machines at home service is the only option. Notebooks on the other hand may have a return to depot or an at home service contract.

8. OS Backup Disk - For over a year now, Dell has required you to purchase your Backup/Reinstall Disk. Order this with your machine. Once your Dell is delivered, it is a pain to get the disk at all, much less at a sensible price. If you do not have this disk and your hard drive dies, at home warranty repair will not be able to get your PC running once the drive is swapped without selling you a new copy of your OS.

UPDATE: Current Dell rep says: Dell no longer requires the purchase of the backup disk. They are included with every computer that ships with a Windows OS. On the subject of hard drives, if your drive fails within the first year of purchase you should be sent an imaged drive that will contain everything except for your royalty applications (Office etc). If for some reason you lose the media, you can request the OS, Resource/Drivers disk, and the applications disk at no cost to you. (Even if you are no longer under warranty Dell will send you an OS disk) Note that the Resource/Drivers and Applications disk is only available for currently shipping systems. Should you need to reinstall you'll need to download the drivers from support.dell.com from another computer and copy them over. Last, within the first year of purchase, if you need to reinstall the OS and you can't access the recovery image, or if it was deleted for some reason, you can request an System Recovery CD that does pretty much the same thing. (Not available on notebooks due to the Media Direct partition.)

9. DPA/Dell Preferred - This is the Dell credit card, like a Sears, Macy's or Radio Shack credit card. Typically a high rate, low limit card. The lowest APR is still around 18-20%, and that comes with a $5,000 limit. The $4,000, $3,000 and $2,000 limits have rates in the mid to high 20s. The lowest limt, $1,500, has an APR of 29.99%. NEVER USE THIS UNLESS THERE IS A KILLER NO INTEREST PROMOTION.

a. Interesting Note: In the Back-To-School season of 2005, DFS (Dell Financial Service) was issuing cards to 18 year olds with a $7,000 limit and a 29.99% interest rate.

Stuff you may not know:

1. Promotion cycle dates - Thursday is the first day of new promotions. If you go to the web site at 11:45 p.m. on Wednesday night and again on 1 a.m. on Thursday morning, the promotions are different. The catalog promotions run from the start of the month to the end. Additionally, on holiday weekends (Memorial Day, 4th of July, etc.) there may be special sales/coupons for the three-day weekend.

2. Promotion styles - Typically, one week will be cash off while the next will be percentage off. If you liked cash off but the current promotion is percentage off, check the "As Advertised-Newspaper" section. These typically have a remnant of the prior week's promotion as well as better versions of the current week's promotions. Cash off helps for cheap systems, percentage off helps with high-end.

3. Dell Customer Care can price match within 24 hours from the time of order. Combining #1 and #2 from this section, if you are unsure of the value of the week's promotion but need to order something, order it Wednesday night. Check the promotions for the new week on Thursday. If its better, call and price match. If its not, sit back and feel smug for no reason

4. Dell corporate email - As of December 2006, everybody (save Michael Dell) working for Dell U.S. has the same form of email address: firstname_lastname@dell.com. Michael Dell's does not follow this pattern and is changed immediately whenever the current one is discovered by lower-level employees or the public.

5. Dell's internal fiscal calendar is different from other corporations. As their fiscal year ends in January or February (I honestly don't remember), the best deals will typically be found in late January and all of February. Also, buying during the last week of any quarter typically means free or deeply-discounted 2nd day or overnight shipping, and the quickest order turnaround. There are no steep discounts for the holidays, though they will run a few weeks of consecutive percentage off promotions during the back to school season in August.

6. The DFS servers are notoriously flimsy. If you apply for DPA (why would you?) and it is unable to complete, it means the server is overloaded but your credit rating has already been pinged. Reapplying will not fix the issue but it will repeatedly ping your credit. The system is unable to verify cell phone numbers and will automatically reject based on the use of one.

Fun facts about the Kiosks:

1. Why should I shop at a kiosk? I can order from home. - A very valid point, but the majority of kiosk customers are morons who think computers are magic boxes that let you see pictures of cats in funny poses while someone steals your AOL password. There's a few reasons why an educated person aka Consumerist reader should hit the kiosk up:

a. Discounts - There are several ways the Dell Direct kiosks can attempt to match or beat an online deal.

i. Closing tools - Dollar off coupons that depend on how much you spend. Spend $600=$25 off; $1200=$50 off; $1,600=$75 off; $2,000=$100 off.

ii. Refuse to Lose - 10% coupons meant to allow a sales rep to seal a large deal. These can only be used when the computer price alone is $1,600 or more. It can not be used on accessories, TVs or multiple computers whose aggregate value is above $1,600. This must be requested from the Manager on Duty (MOD) through an email request, and will generally be credited before the computer is shipped.

iii. DPA coupon - Dell will already give you 2% off your order if, at the payment screen you click the link that offers 2% off when you pay with DPA. The kiosks have a 3% DPA closing tool that can be used also, giving a discount of slightly over 5%. This works for all DPA purchases including TV's, monitors and cameras.

iv. The closing tools are nothing but individual-use coupons entered at the shopping cart. They are invalid on the home and small business site. Reps are supposed to use them as a last-ditch effort, but as long as you're not buying a sub-$600 system, they should offer them without your having to ask.

b. Printer cartridges - No you can't buy them there...officially. They are non-inventoried items that many kiosks have a heady supply of due to inexplicably random deliveries from corporate. If you're in a pinch and need one that day, go (don't call), get a feel for the employees, and if you think they're cool with it, offer cash.

2. There are two levels of kiosk employees. There are those hired by Spherion, creatively known as "Spherion reps," and then there are Dell Branded Reps, or DBRs. DBRs are effectively the management of the individual kiosk, and are the only ones able to work uncompensated overtime. Deal with them if possible, because they are very likely to be there the next time if you have a question. They've also been there much longer than any other kiosk staff, so they likely have a much better skill set for finding bargains.

3. If you have a problem with DPA, the kiosk has a specific email contact for Dell Financial. Problems can be resolved much much faster.

4. The Dell Direct kiosk website is configured differently than the others. There are "bundles" (linked from the main page under the "start shopping" graphics) and there are "non-bundles". Bundles, so called because...you guessed it...accessories and service are already bundled in, have a higher profit margin. They are also the most customizable system on the website. Non-bundles carry lower profit margins but may be limited. The salesman will always start from a bundle. Let them finish, then make them search the non-bundles for an equal system with a better price.

5. Kiosk reps are judged on the following:

a. Unit price: The average sale price of each reps transactions. $1,200 was the goal as of March, 2007 but $1,600 was preferred.

b. Bundle percentage: Dell varies on what percentage of all sales it wants to be from the "bundle" page depending on the month and who you're talking to. It is typically between 40% and 60%.
c. Service: Each PC/Notebook sale is expected to have a 3 year warranty attached. Typically, the number is between $160 and $200.

d. E&A: This is the percentage of the sale that was spent on accessories. Each transaction should have between 5% and 10%, or one printer and cable per PC or one bag, lock and travel mouse per Notebook.
e. DPA: Dell Preferred Account purchases. The expected percentage of DPA sales has climbed in the past years. It currently hovers between 40% and 60%, and they want a 1 to 1 customer to submitted application ratio.

6. Secret shoppers - The kiosks are secret shopped constantly, and they're playing of a 20-question scorecard. Don't be surprised if the salesman asks really base/borderline-insulting questions if you act interested. They think you're a secret shopper.

7. Communication - Complaints made about Dell to the kiosk reps go unheard. There is no place for the rep to turn around and report the complaint to. Communication between reps and even district management is limited, and reps are discouraged from calling the regional management. Store, district and regional management are all run from email and cell phones. It is not uncommon for the kiosks to receive three answers from three departments, with the end result being all three statements retracted without a solution in place.

Motorola Q Registry Tweaks and Hacks

2007-05-27T20:10:00.000-05:00

by: hellomotoq.com
Motorola Q mods and hacks…registry tweaks…what have you… that you may find valuable to your Q-using experience. You will need a registry editor like Resco Registry Editor and Explorer: Resco Explorer 2005 for Smartphone.

And as with most posts of this nature, tweak AT YOUR OWN RISK!

The following is a list of mods/hacks that you will find thereafter:
1. Making the scrollbars smaller (Vert. and Horz.)
2. Moto Q Speed Increases
3. Changing System Startup Sound
4. Turn off Shutter Sound for Camera
5. Change Start Menu into List Instead of Grid
6. Shut Off the Beep that Occurs When You Initiate a Call
7. Page Up and Page Down in IE
8. Change VZW Image that is Above the # Dial Window
9. Change Startup Microsoft Splash Screen
10. Remove Sent Message Popup With SMS.
11. Increasing Call History

1. Making the scrollbars smaller (Vert. and Horz.)
This hack allows 4 icons on a row in the start menu instead of 3 and allows more to be viewed on the screen in IE:
• Go to: HKey_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\GWE\
• Adjust the following values
cyHScr : Horizontal Scrollbars
Height in pixels (default is 6, set it to 3)
cxVScr : Vertical Scrollbars
Width in pixels (default is 6, set it to 3)
• Soft-reset

2. Moto Q Speed Increases
The following 2 hacks increase system performance and makes the Q more responsive:
• Navigate to: HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\GDI\GLYPHCACHE\
Changed limit from 16384 to 32768
• Navigate to: HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\System\StorageManager\FATFS
Changed - CacheSize to 4096

3. Changing System Startup Sound• Navigate to: \HKEY_CURRENT_USER\ControlPanel\Sounds
- At the very bottom of the list of entries, there an entry called AllSounds
- Open that up and you'll see a list of mp3 files.
- All you have to do is append your own audio files (mp3, wma, or wav) to the list. Then you have to make sure that you place your new audio clips in the \Windows folder so that they are accessible.
- The next time you go to the sounds events page, the drop down menu will contain the new clips you added.
• If you want to change the system startup sound, go to:
\HKEY_CURRENT_USER\ControlPanel\Sounds\SystemStart \Sound
- Change the hidden wav file, \Windows\Piano.wav to \Windows\MY_WAV_GOES_HERE.wav
- I'd be really cautious about changing the startup wav. You don't want the phone to lock if the audio file doesn't load. I converted my wav to 16bit, stereo, 22khz WAV file. I didn't use mp3 or WMA. This seems to work fine.

4. Turn off Shutter Sound for Camera• Navigate to:
\HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\System\Pictures\Camera\OEM\Sou ndFile
• In the SoundFile key:
Modify the string/value \windows\shuttersound_02_secs.wav to say \windows\*none*
- Yes it should have the ** around none

5. Change Start Menu into List Instead of Grid• Navigate to:
\HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Shell\StartM enu
• Change the GridView value to 0 if you want list view.
• Change it to 1 if you want grid view.

6. Shut Off the Beep that Occurs When You Initiate a Call• Navigate to:
HKEY_CURRENT_USER\ControlPanel\SoundCategories\InC all2
• Change String/Value InitVol to 0

7. Page Up and Page Down in IE
Key mapping for "Page Up" and "Page Down" in Internet Explorer
• Open your favorite registry editor then navigate to HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\Software\Microsoft\Internet Explorer
• Create a new key 'KeyMaps' (without the quotes)
• Under KeyMaps, create 2 new DWORD values:
50 with a value data 1 (this will make key "2" Page Up)
56 with a value data 2 (this will make key "8" Page Down)
- I created 2 more DWORD values:
52 with a value date 5 (this will make key "4" Page Left)
54 with a value date 6 (this will make key "6" Page Right)
The key name is the keycode you want. 50 = Key 2, 56 = Key 8, 52 = Key4, and 54 = Key
• Other DWORD values available are:
1 - Page Up
2 - Page Down
3 - Top
4 - Bottom
5 - Left
6 - Page Rignt
7 - Horizontal Top
8 - Horizontal Down
9 - Default Layout
10 - Desktop Layout
11 - One Column Layout
12 - Full Screen Toggle
13 - Show Pictures Toggle
Keycodes Values for 0-9: 48='0', 49='1', 50='2', 51='3', 52='4', 53='5', 54='6', 55='7', 56='8', 57='9'.
• Exit registry editor once you have mapped it to your favorite keys.

8. Change VZW Image that is Above the # Dial Window
When you go to dial a # you will see a Verizon Wireless Image above that #.

To get rid of this or to change it...

• Upload the desired image to /windows.
The default VZW image is 240x27. However the author, tonyxcom, says: "Oh, and you can pretty much make the image any size you want. I made mine 320. If you make it any less wide, it will get stretched."
• Navigate to:
HKLM/Software/Microsoft/Shell/Rai/:MSCdial/
Click on the String/Value BannerImage
You will see in the String: /windows/16_brick_131.gif
Type in the string field: /windows/YourImagesName.jpg
YourImagesName.jpg being the name of the file you put in the /windows folder in Step 1.

Someone named Ben Hirashima has an auto installing CAB file for this hack. It can be downloaded at:
http://benhirashima.com/hostedFiles/DialPad.CAB

9. Change Startup Microsoft Splash Screen
The file that we are dealing with is "ms_screen.png". The system uses this file for both the startup and shutdown screens. There are 2 ways to do this mod. The first is to create another image file named ms_screen.png, and move it into your windows directory. Of course it will need to be 320x240, and I would save in PNG format just to be safe. Be sure to make a backup of the original just in case you happen to botch something.
The method that I chose was to create a PNG file, again 320x240, and save it under a different filename. Then, move this file into the Windows directory. Now it's time to edit the registry to point to this new file.

The registy keys are located at: HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\Software\Microsoft\Splash Screen
We are interested in the CarrierBitmap, MSBitmap, and MSShutdownBitmap keys. They point to the \Windows\ms_screen.png file by default. Change all 3 to the new filename, and restart the Q. You should see your new startup logo after the Verizon logo and animations, prior to your Home screen coming up.

10. Remove Sent Message Popup With SMS.
• Navigate to: HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Inbox
• Next, click on Inbox (make sure the Inbox is highlighted) and select Edit, New Key
• Name the New Key as "Settings"
• Click on "Settings" (make sure the Settings is highlighted) and select Edit, New String Value
• On "Value name:", key in SMSNoSentMsg and in "Value data", key in 1
• Soft reset your device and test it with one SMS, and you will notice that the SMS Sent bubble is being disabled

11. Increasing Call History• Navigate to: \HKEY_CURRENT_USER\ControlPanel\Phone
"CallHistoryMax" contains the number of numbers that will be kept in history. [ie. change it to 100]

[Here is one that I didn’t venture to try: ]

USB Native Tethering, Make DUN Settings Stick
• To make the DUN setting (##342587) stick, do the following delete the following string value: HKey_Local_Machine\init\"Launch99"
• Exit regedit, dial in ##342587. Select OK, then Exit.
• Reset your Q.
Upon restart, the Modem Link app will be there indefinitely, lest you do the ##342587 again and disable it.
NOTE: Unless you take certain measures your phone can lock up 80% of the time.

Cool Moto Q Tricks and Shortcuts

2007-05-20T13:42:00.000-05:00

My awesome new phone!

Cool tricks/shortcuts on the Q:
In Internet Explorer, pushing the Space Bar will Page-Down
- To silence the ringer of an incoming call, move the scroll wheel down
- Hold down the spearkphone button to enable Voice Recognition
- During a call, the same button toggles Speakerphone ON/OFF
- Automatic Profile toggles between Normal and Meeting depending on your Outlook Calendar
- by dialing ##342587 You can Enable/Disable Dial Up Networking
- Did you know that when you are in Calculator mode that if you click the scroll wheel up it adds, and if you click it down it subtracts, and if you press in on the wheel, it is the same as pressing the = key! It is very fast to type in the numbers with one thumb while adding and subtracting with the other.
- Pressing any alpha key at the home screen will bring up the contact list...and filter the contacts based on the alpha key you pressed.
- When composing an email or SMS, in the To: field, press the Return button or Center D-pad to bring up your Contacts
- To bring up the recent call list, just press the "Space Bar" while at the home screen.
- You can press the home key, then space key to lock the Q
- Holding down the Home key brings up the "Quick List"
- To control your Volume Level with your Media Player.. Press & Hold the Trackwheel
- To use Call Waiting, use the wheel on the side as a button to switch between calls.
- You can pull up a special characters menu by pressing ALT then CAPS key while in a text box
- Holding down the email/light key turns the light off on the Q.
- When in Camera mode, Up and Down on the d-pad change the Zoom level (Still ONLY), and Left and Right on the d-pad change the Brightness
- If you press and hold the Enter key (far right), a menu to power on/off the Bluetooth/Phone appears

Install Vista from a USB Thumb Drive!

2007-02-27T22:51:00.000-05:00

As reported from otgnet.com

WHY INSTALL FROM USB FLASH DRIVE?
Why would someone want to install a client OS from a thumb drive instead of a DVDROM or over the network? One reason: Performance. Installing Windows Vista from a high speed USB flash drive is in my experience the easiest & fastest way to complete a Windows Vista install. This is much faster than using a DVD, gigabit ethernet, or possibly even some external USB 2.0 hard drives, due to differences in access speed & transfer rate. To put this into perspective, y'know how installing Windows on a Virtual PC virtual machine from an .ISO CD image is really, really, really fast? Imagine something roughly just as fast, except for doing installations of the OS on to actual workstations.

STEP-BY-STEP INSTRUCTIONS
Here's some step-by-step instructions on how we do this, some of which was adapted from Josh's instructions, again, kudos to Josh.

Acquire an ultra-fast USB 2.0 flash drive
The drive I and my coworkers recommend is the Apacer 4GB Handy Steno USB Flash Drive HT203, 200X Hi-Speed USB 2.0. It's the fastest USB 2.0 Flash Drive that we've found - it has a read speed of 25MBytes/sec. & a write speed-14MBytes/sec and also works great as a ReadyBoost cache. You can get them from $56.99 each:
http://www.directron.com/ht2034g.html

Incidentally, once you've got Windows Vista up and running, you may want to consider getting an ultra-fast SDFlash card, installing it into your laptop or desktop, and leaving it there as a ReadyBoost cache. Why? It can't hurt and they're so cheap that it's worth getting. I personally got a SDFlash card for every one of my machines - the A-DATA 2GB Secure Digital Memory Card, 150X Turbo SD Card has a read speed of more than 22.5MB/s and a write speed of more than 15MB/s. You can get them for $19.99 each:
http://supermediastore.com/adata-2gb-sd-secure-digital-card-150x.html

Format the Apacer Flash Drive
Run CMD.EXE and type the following. Note: This set of commands assumes that the USB flash drive is addressed as "disk 1". you should double check that by doing a list of the disks (type "list disk") before cleaning it. If you have multiple hard drives, like an SDFlash drive or a Multibay drive, you could end up wiping your second drive using this command.
(This was a warning that Josh added to his post along with the following commands that I copied from him, so kudos to Josh)
diskpart
select disk 1
clean
create partition primary
select partition 1
active
format fs=fat32
assign
exit

Copy Windows Vista's DVD ROM content to the Flash Drive
Simply issue the following command to start copying all the content from the Windows Vista DVD to your newly formatted high speed flash drive.
xcopy d:\*.* /s/e/f e:\
And that's it. Boot up the machine, have it boot off the USB drive, and watch how fast the installation completes. If you thought Windows Vista installed quickly before (usually 20-25 minutes per install of Windows Vista Ultimate Edition) then let's see how you like having Windows Vista install in less than 5-10 minutes. The slowest part of the install will probably be the computer waiting for you to type in information in the setup fields, and even that can be automated using the Windows Automated Installation Kit.

(Oh yeah... and for you server jockeys: Windows Server Longhorn will be installable in the same way. Gone are the days of waiting more than an hour just to get the OS up and running!)

38 Sites for TV Shows

2007-02-25T12:56:00.000-05:00

TV-Links replacements

SurfTheChannel
Alluc

The Rest:
http://tvunderground.org.ru/
http://www.freetvsearch.com
http://www.craftytv.com
http://www.tvlinkvault.com
http://www.freetvsearch.com/
http://www.surfthechannel.com/
http://www.ssupload.com/
http://www.videolemon.com
http://movies.nabolister.com
http://flickpeek.com
http://www.findtvlinks.com/
http://www.shoutwire.com/viewstory/90965/Watch_Any
http://www.joost.com/
http://www.ovguide.com/
http://www.watchtvsitcoms.com/simpsons.php
http://www15.alluc.org/alluc/
http://www.live-online-tv.com/
http://www.findago.com/series/
http://online-television.tv/
http://www.craftytv.com/
http://beeline.tv/
http://www.movies-on-demand.tv/
http://www.peekvid.com/
http://aknof.blogspot.com/2007/01/free-goodies-for
http://quicksilverscreen.com/
http://Alloftv.net
http://joox.net
http://quicksilverscreen.com/ipb/
http://www.videolemon.com
http://movies.nabolister.com
http://flickpeek.com
http://showstash.com
http://teevee4me.com
http://wheeya.com
http://emuduel.com
http://www.findago.com/series/

Six Things To Do With A PC When You Have No Internet Connection

2007-02-05T08:44:00.000-05:00

1. Clean out and categorize your bookmarks. I don’t know about you, but I tend to just click ‘bookmark this page’ and call it good. Yesterday, when I hit my favorites to let the bookmark list scroll down it took way too long to get to the bottom. 10 seconds worth of scrolling bookmarks is way too many. If you haven’t visited a site in a month it’s not important. Create yourself folders and organize the bookmarks after you’ve eliminated all those links you don’t need.

2. Uninstall programs you don’t use. Why get rid of them when you have plenty of space on the drive? Because it makes things like Scandisk and Defrag run faster. It might not make your PC run any smoother, but you’ll feel good knowing you aren’t wasting space.

3. Unplug your PC, take the cover off and clean out the dust. Invest in some canned air. If I don't have canned air I blow out the case with a hair-dryer. Remember, heat is a PC’s enemy and even in a clean environment, cooling fans suck dust through every opening and it builds up fast. If you have pets, do it once a month. I cleaned out enough dust to build a rabbit hutch to keep all the dust bunnies in.

4. Write your next blog post. If you use a blog client like BlogDesk just write and save. If not, write to a text file and format it after your connection is live. Not being connected may force you to write about something different, like say, five things to do when you have no Internet connection.

5. Run any maintenance programs you don’t have auto-scheduled. Reclaim your drive space and allow your PC to run smoother.

6. Write down your logins and passwords for all your sites, blogs, email accounts, Adsense, affiliate programs, where you purchased your domain names, etc. All that information is the key to your business. If something should happen to you your spouse or significant other will need that information.

When you’re done, put the information in a safety deposit box or keep it in a fire resistant safe at the house and let the people that may need that information know where it is kept

Amazing Acoustic Guitar

2006-12-15T07:17:00.000-05:00

Andy Mckee - Drifting

Vista's Snipping Tool

2006-12-12T19:02:00.000-05:00

While the old 'Print Screen' still works in Vista to capture the entire screen to your clipboard, you then need to paste that image into a program like paint in order to copy the part you want and save it to disk or in a document. Vista's new Snipping Tool simplifies this task.

Available under the Start menu's Programs/Accessories (or simply type Snipping, or Snipping Tool in the search box), Snipping Tool allows you to capture the entire screen, the active window, a rectangle, or even a 'freestyle' selection. Once captured, you can save the file to disk as HTML, JPG, GIF, or PNG. If you have the mail program setup, you can also e-mail the file.

This tool is great. If you have ever used the downloadable free utility Zapgrab it's very similar, but you don't need to paste you copy into paint or another program in order to use the screen-shot. It already does this for you! To be honest it's a simple utility and there's not a whole lot more to it. Just mess with it and you'll see how easy it is to use. You can also use Free-From to draw with a pen the area you want to snip. I've been waiting for a tool like this for a long time! Enjoy!

List of Live TV Websites for Viewing on Your PC

2006-12-12T05:53:00.001-05:00

Internet TV website list:
chooseandwatch.com
tv4all.com
medinalia.com
live-online-tv.com
freetube.co.nr
neeptv.com
tvfreeload.com
peekvid.com
streamick.com
channelking.com
blip.tv
channelchooser.com
worldtvpc.com

Free software for watching TV over internet:
coolstreaming.us
cybertelly.com
tvunetworks.com
getdemocracy.com
fireant.tv
pplive.com
ppstream.com
ppmate.com
streamerone.it
sopcast.org
tvkoo.com
tvants.com
zattoo.com
itv.mop.com

Dexter on Showtime!

2006-12-11T21:48:00.000-05:00

This is quite possibly the best show I've ever seen on TV. If you haven't seen this show you need to! Dexter works forensics in Miami as a blood spatter expert, but has a yearning to kill. The twist? You actually like the guy, but he's a serial killer. The reason you pull for him is because he only kills those that deserve killing. He is a serial killer of serial killers. Even his girlfriend, co-workers, and sister have absolutely no idea what he actually does. I know it sounds a little disturbing, but it's very well put together, not as gory as you would think and the plot twist are absolutely fantastic. The writers should be commended. I swear this is the best series I've ever watched. Every time one ends I can't wait for the next one!

Set your DVR! Here are some Dexter links:

Dexter on Showtime - You can watch episodes 1 and 2 free online!
Dexter on Myspace - A great Myspace page!
Dexter on YouTube - Video Log of Dexter

Birds - from Pixar

2006-12-11T20:02:00.000-05:00

This is an absolutely hilarious short from Pixar!

Don't Expect Geforce 8800 Drivers for Vista Anytime Soon!

2006-12-03T21:19:00.000-05:00

Quote:
"We recognize that many GeForce 8800 customers are eager to use their new hardware with Windows Vista. We've received numerous questions from users, and we've seen your comments and complaints on the forums.

Due to rigorous testing requirements to ensure stability and optimal performance, Vista drivers for GeForce 8800 are still in QA. Our driver team and test labs must ensure compatibility across multiple platforms and hundreds of applications, a process that takes several weeks to complete. Please keep in mind that Windows Vista will not be available to end-users until the end of January. We'd like to assure you that Vista drivers for the GeForce 8800 will be available to download when Vista ships to end users at the end of January.

Thank you."

Granted Vista hasn't officially launched yet, but this is not good news for those that already have an 8800 and have aquired a copy of Vista early for testing, or by other means. With the Vista Business release obviously coming before the release of the Geforce 8800 drivers there are going to be alot of people upset at this news. If you were planning on buying a Geforce 8 series card to run with Vista it sounds like your best bet is to wait until the beginning of the year!

Tweak Vista #1 - Bring Back Start / RUN

2006-11-25T00:24:00.000-05:00

The Start menu layout for Vista has changed tremendously. For instance it doesn't even say Start anymore unless you hover over it. One of the biggest improvements to the menu is the search bar at the bottom of the menu, which searches through your programs, document files, emails and anything else for which a search provider is registered. Want to run Word without having to browse around the "All Programs" menu? Just type "Word" in the searchbar. Can't remember which of the dialog boxes and settings you have to go through to find the Device Manager? Just type "device" in the search bar.

You can run things like this through the search box, but for many programs it's a little quicker and simpler to use run. So lets bring it back. The quick way to get it is to use the Win+R shortcut key combination at any time, but for those who don't like keyboard shortcuts we can add it back to the Start menu.

To restore it permanently to your Start menu, here's what you do:

Open your Start menu, then right-click and choose Properties;
Select the Start Menu tab and click on Customize...;
Scroll down and ensure the "Run command" option is checked;
Click OK, then Apply, then OK again. Your done.

Now the Start / Run command will be restored. Of course, you can swap in and out a bunch of other choices I added Administrative Tools. If you want to pin shortcuts to the left side in the white area of the Start menu, all you need to do is right click the shortcut, or program and select Pin to Start Menu.

My Start Menu:

Windows Vista Shortcuts

2006-11-24T21:37:00.000-05:00

Explorer Shortcuts
ALT+D	Select the Address bar
CTRL+E	Select the Instant Search box
F5	Refresh the active window
ALT+UP ARROW	View the folder one level up in Windows Explorer
ALT+LEFT	Go backward to previous location in history
Backspace	Navigate to parent folder if there are no previous navigations. Navigate to previous location in history if one exists.
ALT+RIGHT	Go forward to next location in history
ESC	Cancel the current task or search
F10 or ALT	Activate the menu bar in the active program
F6	Cycle focus to next UI element in Explorer
ALT+F4 or CTRL+W	Close the active item, or exit the active program
F4	Display the Address bar list in Windows Explorer
F3 or CTRL+F	Search for a file or folder
CTRL+N	Opens current location in a new window
F11	Turn Full Screen Mode on or off
ALT+SPACEBAR	Open the shortcut menu for the active window
ALT+TAB	Cycle through open windows
CTRL+ALT+TAB	Cycle through open windows without closing the menu
CTRL+ESC	Display Start Menu
CTRL+SHIFT+ESC	Task Manager

Listview Shortcuts
CTRL+A	Select all items in a document or window
END	Select last item in the active window
HOME	Select first item in the active window
CTRL+END	Move focus to last item in the selected window without selecting
CTRL+HOME	Move focus to first item in the selected window without selecting
CTRL+Arrow keys+Spacebar	Allows discontinuous multiple selection of items
SHIFT with any arrow key	Select more than one item in a window or on the desktop, or select text within a document
SHIFT+F10	Display the shortcut menu for the selected item
F2	Rename the selected item
ALT+ENTER	Display properties for the selected item
DELETE or CTRL+D	Delete the selected item and move it to the Recycle Bin
SHIFT+DELETE	Delete the selected item without moving it to the Recycle Bin first
CTRL+PLUS key on Number Pad	Delete the selected item without moving it to the Recycle Bin first

Instant Search Box Shortcuts
ALT+ENTER	Searches for entered term and opens Search Pane (does not work in Start Menu)
SHIFT+ENTER	Searches for entered term using Internet browser (does not work in Start Menu)
CTRL+SHIFT+ENTER	Will launch a selected Application elevated if used from the Start Menu

Folder Tree Shortcuts
*NUM LOCK+ASTERISK () on numeric keypad**	Display all subfolders under the selected folder
NUM LOCK+PLUS SIGN (+) on numeric keypad	Display the contents of the selected folder
NUM LOCK+MINUS SIGN (-) on numeric keypad	Collapse the selected folder
LEFT ARROW	Collapse the current selection (if it is expanded), or select the parent folder
RIGHT ARROW	Display the current selection (if it is collapsed), or select the first subfolder
ALT+LEFT ARROW	View the previous folder
ALT+RIGHT ARROW	View the next folder

Windows Key Shortcuts
Windows logo key	Open or close the Start menu
Windows logo key + #	Launches shortcut in Quick Launch with the position corresponding to the # entered. (eg. Winkey + 1 to launch first item in quick launch menu)
Windows logo key +BREAK	Display the System Properties dialog box
Windows logo key +D	Display the desktop
Windows logo key +M	Minimize all windows
Windows logo key +SHIFT+M	Restore minimized windows to the desktop
Windows logo key +E	Open Windows Explorer navigated to Computer
Windows logo key +F	Search for a file or folder
CTRL+Windows logo key +F	Search for computers
Windows logo key +L	Lock your computer
Windows logo key +R	Open the Run dialog box
Windows logo key +T	Cycle through programs on the taskbar
Windows logo key +TAB	Cycle through programs on the taskbar by using Windows Flip 3-D
CTRL+Windows logo key +TAB	Use the arrow keys to cycle through programs on the taskbar by using Windows Flip 3-D
Windows logo key +SPACEBAR	Bring all gadgets to the front and select Windows Sidebar
Windows logo key +G	Cycle through Sidebar gadgets
Windows logo key +U	Open Ease of Access Center
Windows logo key +X	Open Windows Mobility Center

Login Screen Shortcuts
ALT+S	Power Menu
ALT+W	Switch user
Arrow keys	Navigate between user tiles

Security Screen Shortcuts
ALT+K	Lock machine
ALT+W	Switch user
ALT+L	Log off
ALT+C	Change Password
ALT+T	Task Manager

General Shortcuts
CTRL+C or CTRL+INS	Copy
CTRL+X or SHIFT+DEL	Cut
CTRL+V or SHIFT+INS	Paste
CTRL+Z	Undo
CTRL+Y	Redo
F1	Help
CTRL+SHIFT while dragging an item	Create shortcut to selected item.
CTRL+SHIFT with any of the arrow keys	Highlight a block of text.
CTRL+RIGHT ARROW	Move the insertion point to the beginning of the next word.
CTRL+LEFT ARROW	Move the insertion point to the beginning of the previous word.

Vista Better Than Expected!

2006-11-18T23:37:00.000-05:00

I've now had the final release of Vista Ultimate installed for about a week now. I like it. Never thought I'd say that, but it's true. It's the only operating system I'm running and all my games and programs work! I had to do some scrounging on the internet (guru3d.com is great) to find all the little secrets, but I'm now happier than when I was running XP. I only have one thing left that I'm waiting for and there is no doubt it will come soon. I have a GeForce 7900GT and NVIDIA hasn't released drivers with a control panel yet. Rumors are that we'll have them by this coming week.

Ok my biggest Vista suggestion is to load absolutely every high resource program such as a newer game or Photoshop in Administrator. You do this by simply right clicking on the program you want to run and choose Run as Administrator. If that doesn't get it working for you then run it in XP Compatability mode. You do this by right click-Properties-Compatability. If XP mode doesn't get it to load for you then use Windows 98 mode. It's a small hassle, but it works and it remembers the mode you set it at for the next time you load. I haven't had anything not work at all.

You can wait to upgrade, there's no hurry, but I like new things and get bored easily, so I had to go with the final release. I'm running an AMD 64 3000+ with 2GBs of DDR and Vista runs great. It's very slick and I love the extra features. With XP I would always revert to the Classic Start Menu, but I love the new Vista menu. It's compact and it's a very intelligent design. No more boxes popping out to the side, they all open in the same menu window. You'll get the hang of it in about 10 minutes. The new games are better and the Chess game is absolutely great!

Only some of your current programs need extra attention to run, others will load no problem. As the software makers continue making more Vista compatable software it will obviously get easier, but for now I can deal with the extra click to make Company of Heroes, Call of Duty 2, and Photoshop run without a hitch, because right now there are much more pros than cons.

Most of the problems I've heard about Vista is from lower end systems. I would recommend at least 1GB of ram if you are thinking about switching and if you are a heavy gamer you will want 2GBs. From what I've been reading the overwhelming opinion right now is that the ATI drivers are working better than the NVIDIA Beta drivers, but in their defense they haven't released a final driver for Vista yet. Get on the ball NVIDIA! If you have the rig to do it, then upgrade! If your PC seems even a little sluggish on XP, then don't even attempt it. Me? I'm happy.

Let's start with MySpace

2006-11-18T21:13:00.000-05:00

I'm done with myspace.com. What is it about something new you can't figure out sooner that your not going to like in the long term? Why did I not realize sooner that myspace is garbage. It is just fancy email with a buildable permanent template. That's all it is. Oh the horrible bandwidth sucking pages I've seen. Myspace gives users just enough control to make an extremely horrible page that can play 500 videos and 3oo songs at once combined with 1000 pictures on an ugly background. Oh and lets not forget the tag in the top left corner of most pages where the user swiped the code from some cesspool generator.

Am I being too harsh? I don't think so. On top of the horrible pages people build are the obscene pictures that are posted on your personal page, and then there are the kids. Yes the kids, I'm guessing that probably 85% of myspace users are nothing but over-hormonal teenage kids. Which brings me to yet another reason to hate the abyss that is myspace. This is another scumbag sexual predator platform that gives these disgusting people yet another place on the web to fool kids into their own personal horror. I wish I could have a job where all day I just went from room to room maiming these sick maggots 5 days a week.

Should myspace be taken off the internet? Of course not. It's just that recently I've realized more and more how much I hate myspace and so I've decided to abandon it. Have fun with the space kids. Blogger is my newly rekindled passion. For now...

ChatSpeak

2006-10-25T21:35:00.000-05:00

Words, acronyms & abbreviations on the internet

0-9

! I've got a comment
$0.02 Throwing in your two cents' worth
1FTR One for the road
2 To (or) too
24/7 24 Hours a day, 7 days a week
2DAY Today
2L8 Too late
2MORO Tomorrow
2NITE Tonight
4 For
4ever Forever
4GV Forgive
4U For you
4YEO For your eyes only
? I've got a question (or) please explain
?4U Question for you

A

A-OLS Administrators on-line
A/S Age/sex?
A/S/L Age, sex, location
A/S/L/P Age, sex, location, picture?
AAK Asleep at keyboard
AAMOF As a matter of fact
AAMOI As a matter of interest
AAR At any rate
AAS Alive and smiling
ABC Already been chewed
ACRONYM Abbreviated Coded Rendition of
Name Yielding Meaning
ADDY Address
ADN Any day now
AEAP As early as possible
AFAIAA As far as I am aware
AFAIC As far as I'm concerned
AFAICS As far as I can see
AFAICT As far as I can tell
AFAIK As far as I know
AFAIR As far as I remember
AFAIUI As far as I understand it
AFC Away From Computer
AFJ April fools joke
AFK Away from keyboard
AFN That's all for now
AFU All f**ked up
AFZ Acronym free zone
AIAMU And I'm a monkey's uncle
AIR As I remember; as I recall
AISB As I said before
AISB As it should be
AISI As I see it
AIUI As I understand It
AIW As it was
AKA Also known as
AMAP As much (or) many as possible
AMBW All my best wishes
AML All my love
AMOF As a matter of fact
ANB Age no bar
AND Any day now
ANFAWFOS And now for a word from our sponsor
ANFSCD And now for something completely different
AOAS All of a sudden
AOB Abuse of bandwidth
AOTA All of the above
AP Apple pie
APAC All praise and credit
APYR As per your request
AS Another subject
ASAFP As soon as "friggin" possible
ASAP As soon as possible
ASCII American Standard Code
for Information Interchange
ASL Age, sex, location
AT At your terminal
ATB All the best
ATLA Another three letter acronym
ATM At the moment
ATSL Along the same line
ATTN Attention
ATTYOB Anything that turns you on baby
AV Avatar - picture used in chat room that
represents a person in the chat room
AWCIGO And where can I get one
AWGTHTGTTA Are we going to have to go through this again?
AWHAFY Are we having any fun yet?
AYOR At your own risk
AYSOS Are you stupid or something
AYST Are you still there
AYT Are you there?

B

B Back (or) be
B/C Because
B/F Boyfriend
B3 Blah, blah, blah
B4 Before
B4N Bye for now
B@THPICS4 Be at the pictures for (insert time)
BAC Back at computer
BAC By any chance
BAD Broken as designed
BAK Back at keyboard
BAMF Bad a*sed mother f**ker
BANANA Built absolutely nothing anywhere near anybody
BAU Business as usual
BB Be back
BBB Bye bye baby
BBFBBM Body by Fisher, Brains by Mattel
BBFN Bye bye for now
BBIAB Be back in a bit
BBIAF Be back in a few
BBL Be back later
BBN Bye bye now
BBR Burnt beyond repair
BBS Be back soon (or) bulletin board system
BBSOL Be back sooner or later
BBW Big beautiful woman
BC Because (or) be cool (or) basket case
BCBS Big company, big school
BCC Blind carbon copy
BCNU Be seeing you
BCNUL8R Be see'n you later
BD Big deal
BDC Big dumb company or big dot com
BDN Big damn number
BEG Big evil grin
BF Boy friend
BFD Big f**king deal
BFG Big friendly giant; big f**king gun;
big f**king grin
BFH Big f**king hammer
BFI Brute force and ignorance; bunch
of f**king idiots
BFM Big f**king magic
BFMI Brute force and massive ignorance
BFN Bye for now
BFO Blinding flash of the obvious
BFOG Blouse full of goodies
BFS Big f**king screwdriver
big grin
BG Big grin
BHL8 Be home late
BHOF Bald headed old f*rt
BIC Best in class
BICBW But I could be wrong
BIF Before I forget
BIL Brother-in-law (or) boss is listening
BIN Buy it now
BION Believe it or not
BIOYIOP Blow it out your i/o port
BISS Because I say so
BITD Back in the day
BITD Beaten it to death
BITGOD Back in the good old days
BITMT But in the meantime
BK Because
BKA Better known as
BKAM Between keyboard and monitor
(problem is the user)
BM Byte me
BMA Bite my a*s
BMF Bad m*ther f**ker
BMOC Big man on campus
BMOTA Byte me on the a*s
BMTIPG Brilliant minds think in parallel gutters
BNF Big name fan
BO Buffer (or) brain overload
BOC But of course
BOF Birds of a feather
BOFH Bastard (system) operator from hell
BOGOF Buy one get one free
BOHICA Bend over here it comes again
BOL Best of luck
BOS Big orange switch
BOT Robot (or) back on topic
BOTE Back of the envelope
BOTEC Back of the envelope calculation
BR Bathroom
BR Best regards
BRB Be right back
BRBCTA2S Be right back, can't think of anything to say
BRH Be right here
BRS Big red switch
BRT Be right there
BS Bullsh*t (or) big smile
BSEG Big sh*t eating grin
BSG Broad sweeping generalization; big smiling grin
BSOD Blue screen of death (PC crash)
BT Byte this
BTA But then again
BTA But then again or before the attacks
BTAICBW But then again I could be wrong
BTAIM Be that as it may
BTDT Been there, done that
BTDTGTS Been there, done that, got the T-shirt
BTHOM Beats the h*ll outta me
BTLSOM Beats the living sh*t out of me
BTOBD Be there or be dead
BTSOOM Beats the sh*t out of me
BTTH Boot to the head
BTW By the way
BTWBO Be there with bells on
BUAF Butt ugly ASCII font
BUAG Butt ugly ASCII graphic
BWDIK But what do I know?
BWL Bursting with laughter
BWO Black, white or other
BWQ Buzz word quotient
BYAM Between you and me
BYKT But you know (or) knew that
BYKTA But you knew that already
BYOB Bring your own bottle
BYOH Bat you onna head
BYORL Bring your own rocket launcher

C

C See (or) cool
C & G Chuckle and grin
C/O In care of (for sending mail)
C/P Cross post
C/P/S City or country / profession
/ status (married/single)
C4N Ciao for now
CB Call back
CC Carbon copy; courtesy copy
CE Creative editing
CFD Call for discussion
CFM Confirm
CFV Call for voting
CHOWUR See how you are
CHUR See how you are
CIAO Ciao (pronounced "chow")
Hello or Goodbye in Italian
CIBM Could it be magic?
CID Consider it done (or) crying in disgrace
CIO Cut it out
CIS Compuserve information service
CLAB Crying like a baby
CLI Command line interface
CM Call me
CMF Count my fingers
CMH Cross my heart
CMIIW Correct me if I'm wrong
CMON Come on
CNP Continued in next post
CO Conference (or) company
COB Close of business
COD Cash on delivery
CP Chat post (or) copy protection
CPF Can pigs fly?
CPP C++ or C+ programing language
CRAFT Can't remember a f**king thing
CRAP Cheap redundant assorted products
CRAWS Can't remember anything worth a sh*t
CRPG Character (or computer) Role Playing Game
CRS Can't remember sh*t
CS Cop shop (police station)
CSG Chuckle, snicker, grin
CSL Can't stop laughing
CTC Choking the chicken
CTRN Can't talk right now
CTS Consider the source
CTTD Cute things they do
CTTS Cute things they say
CU See you
CU2 See you, too
CU8R Catch you later
CU@ See you at
CUA See you around (or) commonly used
acronyms (or)common user access
CUCME See you see me (video conference)
CUD Could
CUL See you later (or) catch you later
CUL8R See you later
CULA See you later, alligator
CUS See you soon
CW2CU Can't wait to see you
CWOT Complete waste of time
CWYL Chat with you later
CY Calm yourself
CYA See ya
CYA See ya (or) cover your a*s.
CYA See you (or) cover your a*s
CYAL8R See you all later.
CYL See you later
CYO See you online

D

D&C Duck and cover
d/c Disconnects
D/L Download
d/l Download
D8 Date
DAF Divorced Asian female
DAM Divorced Asian male
DAMIFINO D*mn if I know
DAP Parents against dyslexia
DARFC Ducking and running for cover
DBA Doing business as
DBEYR Don't believe everything you read
DBF Divorced black female
DBM Divorced black male
DBN Doing business, not
DD Due diligence (or) Darling daughter
DDD Direct distance dial
DDSOS Different day, same old sh*t
DEGT Don't even go there
DETI Don't even think it
DETLA Double extended three letter abbreviation
DEU Dumb end user
DFL Dead f**king last
DFU Don't forget units
DGT Don't go there
DH Dear hubby; dumb hubby; deaf hubby; d*ckhead
DHTB Don't have the bandwidth
DHYB Don't hold your breath
DIIK D*mn if I know
DIIN D*mned if I know
DIKU? Do I know you?
DIL Daughter in law
DILLIGAD Do I look like I give a d*mn?
DILLIGAF Does it look like I give a f**k
DILLIGAFF Do I look like I give a flying f**k?
DILLIGAS Do I look like I give a sh*t
DINK Double income, no kids
DINKY Double income, no kids yet
DIS Did I say
DIY Do it yourself
DJF Divorced Jewish female
DJM Divorced Jewish male
DK Don't know
DKDC Don't know don't care
DKU Drop kick ugly
DL Download
DLG Devilish little grin
DLTBBB Don't let the bed bugs bite
DLTM Don't lie to me
DNA Did not answer
DNPM Darn near p*ssed myself
DNR Dinner
DOA Dead on arrival
DOB Date/day of birth
DOM Dirty old man
DOTGOV Government site
(from the .gov domain names)
DOY Dumbass of the year
DQMOT Don't quote me on this
DQYDJ Don't quit your day job
DRA Don't recognize acronyms
DRIB Don't read if busy
DS Darling son
DSTR8 D*mn straight
DTA Don't trust anybody
DTD Document type definition
DTOKAB Drop to one knee and blow
DTP Desktop publishing
DTRT Do the right thing
DTS Don't think so
DU Don't understand
DUCT Did you see that?
DUCWIC Do you see what I see
DUK Dead upon keyboard
DWF Divorced white female
DWIM Do what I mean
DWIMC Do what I mean, correctly
DWIMNWIS Do what I mean, not what I say
DWKOTA Deep wet kiss on the a*s
DWKOTL Deep wet kiss on the lips
DWL Dying With Laughter
DWM Divorced white male
DWYM Does what you mean
DYE D*mn your eyes!
DYHWIH Do you hear what I hear
DYJHIW Don't you just hate it when...
DYK Did you know
DYSTSOTT Did you see the size of that thing
DYSWIS Do you see what I see

E

E-OK Electronically OK
E2EG Ear to ear grin
EAK Eating at keyboard
EBKAC Error between keyboard and chair
ED Emotionally disturbed (or) Erectile dysfunction
EDP Emotionally disturbed person
Evil grin
EG Evil grin
EGC Extrememly gruntled customer
EIF Exercise in futility
EM E-mail
EMA E-mail address
EMFBI Excuse me for butting in
EMFJI Excuse me for jumping in
EMRU Error message replace user
EMS E-mail shorthand
EMSG E-mail message
EMTA Evil minds think alike
EOB End of business
EOD End of discussion
EOD End of discussion (or) end of day
EOE Equal opportunity employer (or) employment
EOF End of file
E-OK Electronically OK
EOL End of lecture
EOM End of message
EOT End of thread (or) transmission (don't
reply to this message)
ERU Error replace user
ES&D Eat sh*t and die
ES<HI Eat sh*t and live to hate it
ESAD Eat sh*t and die
ESAL Eat sh*t and live
ESBAM Eat sh*t, bark at moon
ESO Equipment smarter than operator
ESOSL Endless snorts of stupid laughter
ESP Especially (usually just "esp.")
ETA Estimated time of arrival
ETD Estimated time of departure
ETE Estimated time en route
ETLA Extended three letter acronym
EWI E-mailing while intoxicated
EZ Easy

F

F Female
F2F Face to face
F2T Free to talk
FA F**k all
FAB Features attributes benefits
FAI Frequently argued issue
FAIK As far as I know
FAQ Frequently asked Question(s)
FBKS Failure between keyboard and seat
FBOW For better or worse
FC Fingers crossed
FCFS First come, first served
FCOL For crying out loud!
FDROTFL Falling down rolling on the floor laughing
FE Fatal error
FF&PN Fresh fields and pastures new
FFRD Flying f**k in a rolling donut
FFS For f**ks sake
FHFHFH F**k him, feed him fishheads
FHOF Freeware hall of fame
FICCL Frankly, I couldn't care less
FIGJAM F**k i'm good, just ask me
FIGMO F**k it, got my orders
FIIK F**k if I know
FIIN F**ked if I know!
FIIOH Forget it, I'm outta here
FIL Father-in-law
FIOFYF Figure it out for yourself, f**ker
FISH First in, still here
FISHDO F**k it, sh*t happens, drive on
FITB Fill in the blank
FLA Four letter acronym
FLK Funny looking kid
FMTYEWTK Far more than you ever want to know
FNI F**king not involved
FO F**k off
FOAD F**k off and die
FOAF Friend of a friend
FOAFOAG Father of a friend of a girlfriend
FOAG Father of a girlfriend
FOB Fresh off the boat
FOCL Falling off the chair laughing
FOCLMAO Fell off chair laughin my a*s off
FOD Finger of death
FOF Friend of a friend
FOFL Fall on the floor laughing
FOMCL Fell off my chair laughing
FOOBAR Same as fubar
FOOMCL Fell out of my chair laughing
FOR For obvious reasons
FOS Freedom of speech; full of sh*t
FOT Full of tripe
FOTCL Falling off the chair laughing
FotR Fellowship of The Rings (a Tolkien book)
FRE Frequently requested enhancement
FRED F**king ridiculous electronic device
FRT For real though
FRZ Fruitin' religious zealot
FS For sale
FTASB Faster than a speeding bullet
FTDS F**k the/this dumb sh*t
FTF Face-to-face
FTL Faster than light
FTP File transfer protocol
FTR For the record
FTS Fixin' to Start (or) F**k this sh*t
FTTB For the time being
FTTT From time to time
FTW F**k the world
FU F**k you
FUBAB F**ked up beyond all belief
FUBAR F**ked up (or) fouled up beyond all repair
FUBB Fouled up beyond belief
FUD Fear, uncertainty, and doubt or disinformation
FUMTU F**ked up more than usual
FURTB Full up ready to burst
FURTB Full up ready to burst (about hard drives)
FWIW For what it's worth
FWMAYOR F**k with me at your own risk
FY&TSYRIO F**k you & the sysop you rode in on
FYA For your action (or) amusement
FYA&E For your amusement and edification
FYDITM F**k you directly in the mouth
FYEO For your eyes/ears only
FYI For your Information
FYIFV F**k you I'm fully vested
FYIV F**k you, I'm vested
FYKI For your kind information
FYM For your misinformation
FYYSOS F**k you, you sack of sh*t

G

Grin
G Grin
G/F Girl friend
G2G Got to go
G2R Got to run
GA Go ahead
GAC Get a clue
GAFIA Get away from it all
GAFM Get away from me
GAL Get a life
GALGAL Give a little, get a little
GAS Greetings and salutations
GB Goodbye
GBH Great big hug
GBH&K Great big hug and kiss
GBH&KB Great big hugs and kisses back
GBTW Get back to work
GBY God bless you
GC Garbage collect (tidy up)
GD&ARF Grinning, ducking and running fast!
GD&ARVVF Grinning, ducking and running very very fast!
GD&AW Grinning, ducking and weaving
GD&H Grinning, ducking & hiding
GD&R Grinning, ducking and running
GD&RF Grinning, ducking and running fast
GD&RVVF Grinning, ducking and running very very fast!
GD&W Grinning, ducking and weaving
GD&WVF Grinning, ducking, and weaving very fast
GDW Grin, duck and weave
GF Girl friend
GFC Going for coffee
GFETE Grinning from ear to ear
GFI Go for it
GFN Gone for now
GFR Grim file reaper
GFU General f**k up
GFY Go f**k yourself
GG Gotta go (or) good game (or) good going
GGC Goo goo cluster
GGG Giggle (as in )
GGN Gotta go now
GGOH Gotta get out of here
GGP Gotta go pee
GH Getting hard (male)
GIAR Give it a rest
GIGO Garbage in, garbage out
GIWIST Gee, I wish I'd said that
GJ Good job
GKW God knows what
GL Good luck
GL/HF Good luck, have fun
GLG Goofy little grin
GLGH Good luck and good hunting
GLLA Great lovers love alike
GLYASDI God loves you and so do I
GM Good morning (or) Good move match
(or) Got milk?
GMBO Giggling my butt off
GMT Greenwich Mean Time
GMTA Great minds think alike
GMV Got my vote
GN Good night
GNBLFY Got nothing but love for you
GOK God only knows
GOL Giggling out loud
GOOML Get out of my life
GOTFIA Groaning on the floor in agony
GOWI Get on with it
GPF General protection fault (or) go puke, fast!
GR Gotta run
GR&D Grinning running & ducking
GR8 Great
GRAD Grinning running & ducking
GRMBL Grumble
GRRRR Growling
GRUIT Get real you impudent thing
GSHIWMP Giggling so hard I wet my pants
GSOAS Go sit on a snake
GTABO Get that a*s back on (in reply to ROFLMAO)
GTBOS Glad to be of service
GTFOOMF Get the f**k out of my face
GTG Got to go
GTGB Got to go, bye
GTGP Got to go pee
GTH Go to h*ll
GTP Got to pee
GTRM Going to read mail
GTSY Great to see you
GUI Graphical user interface
GW Getting wet (female)
GWATCDR God willing and the creek don't rise
GYPO Get your pants off

H

{{{hug}}} Give someone a hug
Hug
H&K Hug and kiss
H&K Hugs and kisses
H2 How to
HAB Hot Asian babe
HABU Have a better 'un
HAG1 Have a good one
HAGD Have a great day
HAGN Have a good night
HAGO Have a good one
HAK Hugs and kisses
HAND Have a nice day
HB Hug back
HCB Holy cow, Batman!
HD Hold
HF Have fun
HGAC Hasn't (or) haven't got a clue
HH Holding hands
HHGTTG Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy
HHIS Hanging head in shame.
HHO1/2K Ha ha, only half kidding
HHOJ Ha ha, only joking
HHOK Ha ha, only kidding
HHOS Ha Ha, only serious
HHTYAY Happy holidays to you and yours.
HIB_ Have I been... ?
HIG How's it going?
HIOOC Help! I'm out of coffee
HIRTA Herein after referred to as
HIWTH Hate it when that happens
HLV Hasta la vista
HLVB Hasta la vista, baby
HMFIC Head m*ther f**ker in charge
HMFWRIC Head m*ther f**ker what are in charge
HNG Horny net geek
HOAS Hold on a second
HOHA Hollywood hacker
HOYEW Hanging on your every word
HP Home page
HRT2HRT Heart to heart
HRU How are you?
HSIK How should I know?
HSP Highly sensitive person
HTB Heavens to betsy
HTFSIK How the f**k should I know
HTH Hope this helps
HTML Hyper text markup language
HUA Head up a*s
HUF Horny unattached female
{{{hug}}} Give someone a hug
HUM Horny unattached male
HUYA Head up your a*s
HV Have
HW Hardware
HWS(PEST) Husband wants sex (please excuse
slow typing)
HWUA Head way up a*s

I

IAAA I am an accountant
IAAL I am a lawyer
IAC In any case
IAE In any event
IAGW In a good way
IAITS It's all in the subject
IAM In a meeting
IANAA I am not an accountant
IANAC I am not a crook
IANAD I am not a doctor
IANAL I am not a lawyer
IANALBIPOOTV I am not a lawyer, but I play one on tv
IANYM In a new york minute
IAO I am outtahere
IARTPFWTSIOWIM I am repeating this parrot-fashion with-
out the slightest idea of what I mean
IASH I am so horny
IAT I am tired
IAW In accordance with
IAWTP I agree with this post
IB I'm back
IBB I'll be back
IBC Inadequate, but cute
IBCNU I'll be seeing your
IBK Idiot behind keyboard
IBN I'm buck naked
IBT In between technology
IBTD I beg to differ
IC I see (or) In character
ICBI I can't believe it
ICBW I could be wrong (or) It could be worse
ICFBI I can't f**king believe it!
ICIHICPCL I can't imagine how I could
possibly care less
ICTYBTIHTKY I could tell you but
then I'd have to kill you
ICUR I see you are
ID10T Idiot
IDBI I don't believe it
IDC I don't care
IDD Indeed
IDGAD I don't give a damn
IDGAF I don't give a f**k
IDGAS I don't give a sh*t
IDGI I don't get it
IDK I don't know
IDKY I don't know you
IDN I don't know
IDST I didn't say that
IDTS I don't think so
IDTT I'll drink to that
IE That is (normally i.e.)
IEF It's esther's fault
IFAB I found a bug
IFU I f**ked up
IG2R I got to run
IGGP I gotta go pee
IGP I gotta pee
IGTP I get the point
IHA I hate acronyms
IHATCFYB I have a terrible craving for your body!
IHMB I hate my boss
IHNJ,IJLS I have no joke, I just like saying...
IHTBS It has to be shown
IHTFP I hate this f**king place
(or) I have truly found paradise
IIABDFI If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
IIIO Intel inside, idiot outside
IIMAD If it makes any difference
IINM If I'm not mistaken
IIR If I recall
IIRC If I remember correctly
IITYWIMIWHTKY If I tell you what it means, I
will have to kill you
IITYWIMWYBMAD If I tell you what it means,
will you buy me a drink?
IITYWTMWYKM If I tell you what this means
will you kiss me?
IITYWYBAD If I tell you, will you buy another drink?
IITYWYBMAB If I tell you, will you buy me a beer?
IIUC If I understand correctly
IIWM If it were me
IJLS I just like saying
IJWTK I just want to know
IJWTS I just want to say
IK I know
IKWUM I know what you mean
IKYABWAI I know you are, but what am I?
ILBL8 I'll be late
ILF I'll look forward
ILICISCOMK I laughed, I cried, I spilled coffee on
my keyboard
ILIWTPCT I love it when the plan comes together.
ILN It looks nice
ILSHIBAMF I laughed so hard I broke all my furniture!
ILU I love you
ILY I love you
ILYVM I love you very much
IM Instant message
IMA I might add
IMAO In my arrogant opinion
IMBO In my biased opinion
IMCDO In my conceited dogmatic opinion
IMCO In my considered opinion
IME In my experience
IMHO In my humble opinion
IMMOR I make my own rules
IMMSMC If my memory serves me correctly
IMNERHO In my not even remotely humble opinion
IMNSHO In my not so humble opinion
IMNSVHO In my not so very humble opinion
IMO In my opinion
IMOBO In my own biased opinion
IMPE In my previous/personal experience
IMPOV In my point of view
IMS I must say
IMU I miss you
IMVHO In my very humble opinion
INAL I'm not a lawyer
INGSI I'm not gonna say it
INMP It's not my problem
INPO In no particular order
INT I'll never tell
IOH I'm out of here
IOTTMCO Intuitively obvious to the
most casual observer
IOU I owe you
IOW In other words
IRC Internet relay chat
IRL In real life
IRMC I rest my case
IROOC I've run out of cigarettes
IRSTBO It really s*cks the big one
IS I'm sorry
ISAGN I see a great need
ISDN It still does nothing
ISO In search of; International Organization
for Standardization
ISP Internet Service Provider
ISS I'm so sure
ISTM It seems to me
ISTR I seem to recall
ISWYM I see what you mean
ITAH Is there anybody here
ITFA In the final analysis
ITM In the money
ITRW In the real world
ITSFWI If the shoe fits wear it
ITYM I think you mean
IUSS If you say so
IUTHALORFH I used to have a lot of respect for him/her
IUTKATS I used to know all that stuff
IWALU I will always love you
IWALY I will always love you
IWBNI It would be nice if
IWIK I wish I knew
IWSN I want sex now
IYFEG Insert your favorite ethnic group
IYKWIM If you know what I mean
IYKWIMAITYD If you know what I mean and I think you do
IYO In your opinion
IYSS If you say so
IYSWIM If you see what I mean
IYW If you wish

J

J/C Just checking
J/K Just kidding
J/W Just wondering
JAC Just a sec
JAFO Just another f**king onlooker
JAM Just a minute
JAS Just a second
JASE Just another system error
JFI Just for information
JIC Just in case
JIK Just in case
JJ Just joking
JJA Just joking around
JK Just kidding
JMHO Just my humble opinion
JMO Just my opinion
JOOTT Just one of those things
JP Just playing
JSNM Just stark naked magic
JTLUK Just to let you know
JTLYK Just to let you know
JTYWTK Just thought you wanted to know
JVNP Just venting, nothing personal
JW Just wondering
JYYC Just yanking your chain

K

Kiss
K Okay, alright
KB Kiss back
KCBIWIYWI Keep coming back, it works if you work it
KDW Keep digging, Watson (response to NSS)
KFY Kiss for you
KHYF Know how you feel
KIBO Knowledge in, bullsh*t out
KIBO Knowledge in, bullsh*t out
KISS Keep it simple, stupid
KIT Keep in touch
KITA Kick in the a*s (type of therapy)
KK Okay, Okay
KMA Kiss my a*s
KMB Kiss my butt
KMRIA Kiss my royal Irish arse
KMYF Kiss me you fool
KOC Kiss on the cheek
KOL Kiss on the lips
Kool-Aid Drinker I'm including this definition, even
though this phrase is not an acronym, because
I got an email from someone asking me
what is a Kool-Aid drinker. As best as I can
determine, it is a person who has been totally
deceived by someone or something; or who blindly
and without question adheres to the beliefs of,
or follows, some person, dogma, political idea,
etc. I notice that this term often seems to appear
on forums... and especially on political forums.
The origin of this term, if I understand it correctly,
derives from the 1978 Jonestown, Guyana, mass suicide,
where Jim Jones instructed his followers to
commit suicide by drinking a Kool-Aid type drink
(it was not really Kool-Aid, but Flavor-Aid) laced
with cyanide. Most of them did so, and as a result
over nine hundred people died.
KOTC Kiss on the cheek
KOTL Kiss on the lips
KTCOOTN Keep this crap out of this newsgroup
KUTGW Keep up the good work
KWIM Know what I mean?
KYFC Keep your fingers crossed
KYHOOYA Keep your head out of your a*s
KYPO Keep your pants on

L

L Laughing
L8 Late
L8R Later
L8R G8R Later gator
L8TR Later
LAB&TYD Life's a bitch & then you die
LABATYD Life's a bitch and then you die
LAGNAF Let's all get naked and f**k
LALOTA Lots and lots of thunderous applause
LAMDILLIGAF Look at me, do I look like I give a f**k?
LAQ Lame a*s quote
LART Loser attitude readjustment tool
LBB Little black box (slang - web-tv set-box unit)
LD Long distance (or) later dude
LDR Long distance relationship
LDTTWA Let's do the time warp again
LG Lovely greetings
LHM Lord help me
LHU Lord help us
LI Laughing inside
LIFO Last in first out
LIS Laughing in silence (or) Lost in space
LJBF Let's just be friends
LL Lessons Learned (or) Love Life (or) Living Large
LLTA Lots and lots of thunderous applause
LMA Leave me alone
LMAO Laughing my a*s off
LMAOROTF Laughing my a*s off rolling on the floor
LMBO Laughing my butt off
LMC Lost my connection
LMCOA Lost my connection once again
LMFAO Laughing my f**king a*s off
LMHO Laughing my head off
LMK Let me know
LMKOAP Let me know of any problems
LMTFA Leave me the f**k alone
LMWIS Lick me where I sweat
LOA List of acronyms/abbreviations
LOHICA Look out, here it comes again
LOI Lack of interest
LOL Laughing out loud
LOLAROTG Laughing out loud and rolling on the ground
LOMBARD Lots of money but a real dickhead
LOOL Laughing outrageously outloud
LOPSOD Long on promises, short on delivery
LotR Lord of The Rings (a J.R.R.Tolkien book)
LRF Little rubber feet
LSFIAB Like shooting fish in a barrel
LSHHTCMS Laughed so hard had to change my shorts
LSHIPMP Laughing so hard I peed my pants
LSHMBB Laughing so hard my belly is bouncing
LSHMBH Laughing so hard my belly hurts
LSP Less sensitive person
LTBF Learn to be funny
LTHTT Laughing too hard to type
LTIC Laughing 'til I cry
LTIP Laughing til I puke
LTM Laughing to myself
LTMSH Laughing 'til my sides hurt
LTNC Long time, no see
LTNS Long time, no see
LTNT Long time, no type
LTR Long term relationship
LTS Laughing to self
LULAB Love you like a brother
LULAS Love you like a sister
LULU Locally unwanted land use
LUSER Loser user
LUV Love
LUWAMH Love you with all my heart
LY Love you
LYK Let you know
LYL Love you lots
LYLAB Love you like a brother
LYLAS Love you like a sister
LYVM Love you very much
LZ Loser!

M

M Male
M or F Male or female
M$ Microsoft
M8 Mate
MaB Maybe
MAY Mad about you
MAYB Mad about you, baby
MB Maybe
MBRSD Embarrassed
MBUC Mind bogglingly unlikely coincidence
MCIBTU My computer is better than yours
MCIBTY(SN) My computer is better than yours (so nyerr)
me 2 Me too
MEGO My eyes glaze over
MFD Multi-function device
MFG More friendly garbage
MFIC Mother f**ker in charge
MFWIC Mother f**ker what's in charge
MGD My gameboy died
MHBFY My heart bleeds for you
MHDC(A) My hard drive crashed (again)
MHOTY My hat's off to you
MIF Milk in first (for tea drinking)
MIL Mother in law
MIL Mother-in-law
MILF Mother I'd like to f**k
MILG Make it look good
MIPS Meaningless information per second
ML More later
MLA Multiple letter acronym
MM Market maker
MMIF My mouth is full
MOF Matter of fact
MOO Mud object-oriented
MOOF Modem offline
MOR Middle of the road
MorF Male or female
MOS Member of the opposite sex
MOSS Member of the same sex
MOTAS Member of the appropriate sex
MOTD Message of the day
MOTM Member of the month
MOTOS Member of the opposite sex
MOTSS Member of the same sex
MS More sh*t; more of the same; (or)
Masters Degree
MSCEA My southern comforts' empty again
MSG Message
MSS Member of the same sex
MTCW My two cents worth
MTFBWY May the force be with you
MUD Multi user domain (or dungeon)
MUF Material unaccounted for
MUG New user of a chat program
MUM Miss You Much
MUNG Mash until no good
MUSM Miss you so much
MWA A kiss
MWBRL More will be revealed later
MYM Miss You Much
MYOB Mind your own business

N

N/A Not applicable -or- not affiliated
N/T No text
n00b Newbie
n00b Newbie (the '00's are two zeros, not 'ohs')
N1 Nice one
N2M Not too much
NAGI Not a good idea
NAHM Not a happy man
NAHW Not a happy woman
NAK Nursing at keyboard
NAP Not a problem
NAVY Never again voluneer yourself.
NAZ Name, address, zip (or) NASDAQ
NB Nota bene (note well)
NBD No big deal
NBFD No big f**king deal
NBIF No basis in fact
NBL Not bl**dy likely
NBTD Nothing better to do
NC No comment
NCG New college graduate
NE Any
NE1 Anyone
NETHING Anything
NETUA Nobody ever tells us anything
NEWAY Anyway
NFG No f**king good
NFI No f**king idea
NFIAA No f**king idea at all
NFM No futher message
NFW No f**king way
NFY No f**k you
NG New game (or) New group
NHOH Never heard of him or her
NIAA No idea at all
NICBDAT Nothing is certain but death and taxes
NIDWTC No I don't want to chat
NIFOC Naked in front of the computer
NIFOK Naked in front of the keyboard
NIH Not invented here
NIM No internal message
NIMBY Not in my backyard
NIMFYE Not in my front yard either
NIMQ Not in my queue
NIMTO Not in my term of office
NINO Nothing in, nothing out
NIT Not in therapy
NLI Not logged in
NLT No later than
NM Never mind (or) nothing much
NMFJ Not my f**king job
NMH Not much here
NMI No middle initial
NMJC Nothing much, just chillin'
NMP Not my problem
NN Night-night
NO1 No one
NOPE Not on planet Earth
NORWICH Knickers off ready when I come home
NOYB None of your business
NP No problem
NPA Non-performing assets
NPF No problem found
NPLU Not people like us
NQA No questions asked
NQA No questions asked
NQOCD Not quite our class dear
NQOS Not quite our sort
NRG Energy
NRN No reply necessary (or) Not right now
NSS No sh*t, Sherlock
NT No thanks
NTA Non-Technical Acronym
NTG Not too good
NTH No therapy helpful
NTIBOA Not that I'm bitter or anything
NTIM Not that it matters
NTIMM Not that it matters much
NTL Nevertheless
NTW Not to worry
NTYMI Now that you mention it
NUI Network user identification
NW No way
NWCDP Nothing we could do partner
NYCFS New York City finger salute
NYCTMI Now you come to mention it
NYM New York minute
NYP Not your problem

O

O Over (to you)
OATUS On a totally unrelated subject
OAURS On an unrelated subject
OAUS On an unrelated subject
OB Obligatory
OBE Overtaken by events
OBO Or best offer
OBTW Oh by the way
OD Overdose; oh dear
OEM Original equipment manufacturer
OF Old f*rt
OFO Out f**king off
OFS One finger salute
OI Operator indisposed
OIC Oh, I see
OJ Only joking
OL Old lady (wife)
OLL Online love
OM Oh my
OMDB Over my dead body
OMG Oh my God (or) goodness
OMIK Open mouth insert keyboard
OMIK Open mouth, insert keyboard
ONAW Oh no! another wedgie
ONL OnLine
ONNA Oh no not again
ONNTA Oh no, not this again
OO Over and out (end of communication)
OOC Out of character
OOH Out of here
OOI Out of interest
OOSOOM Out of sight, out of mind
OOTB Out of the box (brand new)
OOTC Obligatory on topic comment
OOTD One of these days
OPL Obvious panty line
OPM Other people's money
OPP Other people's problems
OS Operating system
OSIF Oh sh*t, I forgot!
OSIM Oh sh*t it's Monday
OSU Officially sanctioned user (or) Oh, shut up
OT Off topic (or) Other topic
OT1H On the one hand
OTB Off to bed
OTBE Over taken by events
OTC Over the counter
OTD Out the door
OTE Over the edge
OTF On the floor (or) On the phone
OTFL On the floor laughing
OTK Over the knee
OTL Out to lunch
OTOH On the other hand
OTOMH Off the top of my head
OTOOH On the other other hand
OTP On the phone
OTR Off the rack (or) Old time radio
OTT Over the top
OTTH On the third hand
OTTOMH Off the top of my head
OTTOMHAROO Off the top of my head and
rolling out of bounds
OTW On the way (or) On the whole
(or) Off to work
OW Oh well
OWTTE Or words to that effect
OZ Australia
OZZIE Australian

P Q

P911 My parents are in the room
PABG Pack a big gun
PABG Packing a big gun
PANS Pretty awesome new stuff
PBD Programmer brain damage
PBM Play by mail (games)
PCM Please call me
PCMCIA People can't memorize computer
industry acronyms
PCO Please carry on
PD Public domain
PDA Public display of affection
PDOA Public display of affection
PDOMA Pulled directly out of my a*s
PDQ Pretty darn quick
PDS Please don't shout
PDSTM Please don't shout the message
PEBCAK Problem exists between chair and keyboard
PEBKAC Problem exists between keyboard and chair
peeps People
PF&HOMW Printed, framed and hanging on my wall
PFM Pure f**king magic
PFY Pimply faced youth
PHAT Pretty hot and tempting
PHB Pointy haired boss (from Dilbert)
PhD Piled higher and deeper.
PHD Push here dummy (type of camera)
PIBKAC Problem is between keyboard and chair
PICNIC Problem in chair, not in computer
PIMP Peeing in my pants
PITA Pain in the a*s
PITBY Put it in their back yard
PJW Please just wait
PKB Pot, kettle, black!
PLBKAC Problem lies between keyboard and chair
PLMK Please let me know
PLMKO Please let me know, OK?
PLOKTA Press lots of keys to abort
PLONK Please leave our newsgroup, killfiled!
PLS Please
PLSE Please elaborate
PLZ Please
PM Private message
PMBI Pardon my butting in
PMETC Pardon me etc.
PMF Pardon my french (or) pure f**king magic.
PMFBI Pardon me for butting in
PMFI Pardon me for interrupting
PMFJI Pardon me for jumping in
PMFJIB Pardon me for jumping in but
PMFJIH Pardon me for jumping in here.
PMINBOM Put mind in gear, before opening mouth
PMJI Pardon my jumping in
PMP Peed my pants
PMYMHMMFSWGAD Pardon me, you must have mistaken
me for someone who gives a d*mn
PMYMHMMFSWGAS Pardon me, you must have mistaken
me for someone who gives a sh*t
PNCAH Please no cursing allowed here
PO P*ss off
POAHF Put on a happy face
POC Prisoner of chat; peeping other chatters
POETS P*ss on everything, tomorrow's Saturday
POITS P*ss on it tomorrow's Saturday
POM Phase of the moon
POME Prisoner of Mother England
POOF Leaving the room - goodbye
POP Point of presence; post office protocol
POQ P*ss off quickly
POQADCB P*ss off quickly and don't come back!
POS Parent over shoulder
(or) point of sale (or) piece of sh*t
POSSLQ Person of opposite sex sharing living quarters
POTC Peck on the cheek
POTS Parents over the shoulder
(or) Plain old telephone service
POV Point of view
PPL People
PPN Programmer project number
(currently known as userid)
PPOSTFU Post proof or shut the f**k up
PPP Petty pet peeve
PPPP Previous paragraph was polemical position
PROLLY Probably
PS Post Script
PSY Please stop yelling
PT Physical training
PTB Powers that be
PTL Praise The Lord
PTM Please tell me
PTMM Please tell me more
PTO Patent and Trademark Office
(or) please turn over
PTUM Please tell us more
PU That stinks
PUNTS People of utterly no tactical significance
PW Pathetic wanker; powwow
PXT Please explain that
PYS Pack your stuff
QED Quod erat demonstrandum (proved)
(or) quite easily done
QIK Quick
QL Quit laughing
QSL Reply
QSO Conversation
QT Cutie (or) quiet

R

R Are
R&D Research & development
R&R Rest & relaxation
RA Research assistant; resident assistant
RAEBNC Read and enjoyed, but no comment
RAK Random act of kindness
RAOK Random act of kindess
RBAY Right back at ya
RBS Really big screen
RBTL Read between the lines
RE In regard to (or) hello again
REHI Hi again (re-Hi)
REMF Rear echelon m*ther f**kers
RFC Request for comments
RFD Request for discussion
RFR Really f**king rich
RFS Really f**king soon
RFT Request for thinking
RGDS Regards
RHIP Rank has its privileges
RINGL8 Running late
RKBA Right to keep and bear arms
RL Real life
RLCO Real life conference
RLF Real life friend
RM Ready made
RMA Return material (or merchandise) authorization
RME Rolling my eyes
RML Read my lips
RMLB Read my lips baby
RMMM Read my mail man!
RN Right now!
RNA Ring, no answer
ROF Rolling on the floor
ROFFNAR Rolling on the floor for no apparent reason
ROFL Rolling on the floor laughing
ROFLAHMSL Rolling on the floor laughing
and holding my sides laughing
ROFLAS Rolling on floor laughing and screaming
ROFLASC Rolling on the floor laughing
and scaring the cat
ROFLASTC Rolling on the floor laughing
and scaring the cat
ROFLGO Rolling on floor laughing guts out!
ROFLMAO Rolling on the floor laughing my a*s off
ROFLMAOOL Rolling on the floor lauging
my a*s off out loud
ROFLOL Rolling on the floor laughing out loud
ROFLOLVH Rolling on the floor laughing
out loud very hard
ROFLUTS Rolling on the floor laughing
unable to speak
ROFLWMK Rolling on the floor
laughing... wet my knickers
ROFLWMP Rolling on the floor wetting my pants
ROFPML Roll on floor p*ssing myself laughing.
ROFTTPOF Rolling on the floor trying
to put out flames
ROTBA Reality on the blink again
ROTF Rolling on the floor
ROTFL Rolling on the floor laughing
ROTFLAHMS Rolling on the floor laughing
and holding my side
ROTFLAMAO Rolling on the floor laughing my a*s off
ROTFLMAAOBPO Rolling on the floor laughing
my a*s and other body parts off
ROTFLMAO Rolling on the floor laughing my a*s off
ROTFLMBO Rolling on the floor laughing my butt off
ROTFLOL Rolling on the floor laughing out loud
ROTFLOLPMP Rolling on the floor laughing
out loud and pe*ing in my pants
ROTFLTIC Rolling on the floor laughing till I cry
RotK Return of The King (a Tolkien book)
ROTM Right on the money
RPG Role playing games
RRQ Return receipt request
RSN Real soon now
RSVP Please reply (respondez s'il vous plait)
RT Real time
RTBM Read the bl***y manual
RTBS Reason to be single
RTDox Read the documentation
RTF Read The FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)
RTFAQ Read the frequently asked questions
RTFF Read the f**king faq
RTFFAQ Read the f**king faq
RTFI Read the f**king instructions
RTFM Read the f**king manual (or) message
RTFMS Read the f**king manual, sir (military)
RTFQ Read the f**king question
RTFS Read the f**king source
RTI Real time interruption
RTK Return to keyboard
RTM Read the manual (or) message
RTS Read the screen
RTSM Read the stupid manual
RTWFQ Read the whole f**king question
RU Are you?
RU32NITE Are you free tonight?
RUCMNG Are you coming?
RUMF Are you male or female?
RUOK Are you OK?
RYFIM Read your f**king information manual
RYFM Read your friendly (or) f**king manual
RYS Read your screen

S

(sp?) Unsure of spelling
S Smiling (or) smile
S/O Someone (frequently just "s/o")
S/TH Something (frequently just "s/th")
S2BX Soon to be ex
S2R Send to receive
S4L Spam for life
SAF Single Asian female
SAHM Stay At Home Mom
SAM Single Asian male
SAMF Sad a*s mother f**ker
SAMFU Self-adjusting military f**k up
SAMFUTU Situation abnormal, more f**ked up than usual
SAPFU Surpassing all previous foul ups
SAR Smart a*s remark
SAYOR Speak at your own risk
SB Smiles back
SBB Stupid beyond belief
SBCN Sitting behind the computer, naked
SBD Silent but deadly
SBF Single Black female
SBID Sh*tty but it'll do
SBM Single Black male
SBT Strange but true
SBTA Sorry, being thick again
SCNR Sorry, could not resist
SDIHTT Someday I'll have the time
SE2E Smiling ear to ear
SEC Wait just a second
SED Said enough darling
SEG Sh*t eating grin
SEP Someone else's problem
SETE Smiling ear to ear
SF Surfer friendly
SFAIAA So far as I am aware
SFETE Smiling from ear to ear
SFLA Stupid four letter acronym
SFT Sorry for that
SGML Standardized General Markup Language
SH Same here
SH Sh*t happens
SHID Slaps head in disgust
SHLH Sitting here lauging hysterically
SHTS Spit hitting the spam
SHTSI Somebody had to say it
SICNR Sorry, I could not resist
SICS Sitting in chair snickering
SIG Special interest group
SIG2R Sorry, I've got to run
SIIN Sh*t if I know!
SIL Sister-in-law
SITCOMs Single income, two children,
oppressive mortgage
SITD Still in the dark
SJF Single Jewish female
SJM Single Jewish male
SLAP Sounds like a plan
SLIP Single line in protocol;
(or) serial line internet protocol
SLIRK Smart little rich kid
SLJ Sh*tty little job
SLJO Sh*tty little job officer
SLM See last mail
SMDP System monitoring display protocol
SMEF Serious massive existence failure
SMHID Scratching my head in disbelief
SMMWO Shut my mouth wide open
SMO Serious mode on
SMOFF Serious mode off
SMON Serious mode on
SMOP Small matter of programming
SMS Short message service
SMTP Simple Mail Transfer Protocol
SN Screen name (or) So nyah
SNAC Sitting naked at computer
SNAFU Situation normal, all fouled up
SNAG Sensitive new age guy
SNERT Snotty nosed egotistical rotten teenager
SNFIAA Still no f**king idea at all
SNR Signal to noise ratio
SO Significant other
SOB Son of a b*tch
SOH Sense of humor
SOHF Sense of humor failure
SOI Stink on ice
SOL Sh*t out of luck (or) sooner or later
SOMY Sick of me yet?
SOP Standard operating procedure
SorG Straight or gay?
SOS Help!, (or) "Same old sh*t"
SOSO Same old, same-old
SOTA State of the art
SOTMG Short of time, must go
SOVS Someone very special
SOW Speaking of which
(sp?) Unsure of spelling
SPK Speak
SPST Same place, same time
SRY Sorry
SSDD Same stuff, different day
SSIA Subject says it all
ST Star Trek (or) such that
(usually just "s.t.")
ST Super tired
STATS Age/gender/location check
STBY Sucks to be you
STFU Shut the f**k Up
STFW Surf (or) search the f**king web
STIFF "Stiff", said loudly.
STM Spank the monkey
STR8 Straight
STS So to speak
STW Surf the web (or) search the web
STYS Speak to you soon
SUCDIC Situation under control, d*ckheads in charge
SUFID Screwing up face in disgust
SUITM See you in the morning
SUL See you later
SUNOILTY Shut up, no one is listening to you
SUP What's up?
SUSFU Situation unchanged, still f**ked up
SUYF Shut up you fool
SUYP Shut up you pervert
SW Shareware (or) so what? (or) says who?
SWAG Scientific wild a*s guess
SWAG Stupid wild a*s guess
SWAK Sealed with a kiss
SWALK Sealed with a loving kiss
SWCOC Special wishes, comments, or corrections
SWDYRTW Since when do you rule the web?
SWDYT So what do you think?
SWF Single white female
SWHT Sweetheart
SWIM See what I mean?
SWL Screaming with laughter
SWM Single white male
SWMBO She who must be obeyed
SWWCFI So what, who cares, f**k it
SWYP So what's your problem?
SY Sincerely yours
SYL See you later
SYS See you soon (or) system
SysOP System operator
SYT Sweet young thing

T

T2G Time to go
TA Thanks again
TA Teaching assistant
TAF That's all, folks!
TAFL Take a flying leap
TAFN That's all for now
TAFT That's a frightening thought
TAH Take a hike
TAM Tomorrow a.m.
TAMO Then a miracle occurs
TANJ There ain't no justice
TANSTAAFL There ain't no such thing as a free lunch
TARFU Things are really fouled up
TBC To be continued
TBE To be expected
TBH To be honest
TBYB Try before you buy
TC Take care (or) telephone call
TCB Taking care of business
TCBY Taking care of business, ya'll
TCD The cat's dead
TCO Taken care of
TCS Take care sweetheart
TDD The dog's dead
TDM Too d*mn many
TDTM Talk dirty to me
TEOTWAWKI The end of the world as we know it
TFB Too f**king bad
TFE Too f**king easy
TFH Thread from h*ll
TFM The f**king manual
TFN Thanks for nothing
TFS (ctl-alt-del)-three finger salute
TFTHAOT Thanks for the help ahead of time
TFTT Thanks for the thought (or) tip
TFW Totally f**king worthless
TGAL Think globally, act locally
TGAL Think globally, act locally
TGIF Thank God it's Friday
TGTF Thank God tomorrow's Friday
THHGTTG The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy
THNQ Thank you
THO Titty hard on
THX Thanks
TIA Thanks in advance
TIAD Tomorrow is another day
TIAIL Think I am in love
TIC Tongue in cheek
TID Thread is deteriorating (Off Topic)
TIE Take it easy
TIME Tears in my eyes (often in combination)
TIMTOWTDI There is more than one way to do it
TINALO That is not a legal opinion
TINAR This is not a recommendation
TINJ There is no justice
TINSTAAFL There is no such thing as a free lunch
TINWIS That is not what I said
TIP To insure promptness
TIWTGLGG This is where the goofy little grin goes
TJATAW Truth, justice, and the American way
TKS Thanks
TLA Three letter acronym
TLC Tender loving care
TLG The living God
TLGO The list goes on
TLK2UL8R Talk to you later
TM Text message
TM Thread mangler
TMA Take my advice (or) Too many acronyms
TMFA Too many f**king acronyms
TMI Too much information
TMIKTLIU The more I know, the less I understand
TMK To my knowledge
TMTC Too many to count
TMTOWTDI There's more than one way to do it
TMWFI Take my word for it
TN Telnet
TNOTVS There's nothing on television, so ...
TNSO Temptingly naked significant other
TNSTAAFL There's no such thing as a free lunch
TNT Till next time
TNTL Trying not to laugh
TNX Thanks
TNX Thanks (thanx)
TNX 1.0E6 Thanks a million
TOBAL There oughta be a law.
TOBG This oughta be good
TOJ Tears of joy
TOS Terms of service
TOTC Too old to care
TOY Thinking of you
TPAE The possibilities are endless
TPC The phone company
TPM Tomorrow p.m.
TPS(S) This program sucks (severely)
TPTB The powers that be
TQM Total quality management
TRDMC Tears running down my cheeks.
TRDMTL Tears running down my trouser legs
TS Tough sh*t
TSFY Tough sh*t for you
TSOHF Total sense of humour failure
TSR Totally stupid rules (or)
Terminate and stay resident (program)
TSWC Tell someone who cares
TT Ta ta (or) take that
TT The Two Towers (a Tolkien Book)
TT4N Ta-ta for now
TTBE That's to be expected
TTBOMK To the best of my knowledge
TTFN Ta-ta for now
TTKSF Trying to keep a straight face
TTL4N That's the lot for now
TTM To the moderator
TTMNR Take the money and run
TTS Tiny tit syndrome
TTT That's the truth (or) That's the ticket
TTTT These things take time
TTUL Talk to you later
TTUT Talk to you tomorrow.
TTWIG That's the way it goes
TTYL Talk to you later
TTYL8R Talk to you later
TTYRS Talk to you real soon
TTYS Talk to you soon
TU Thank you
TUC The Ultimate Chatlist!
TUFD The user file died
TWAIN Technology without an interesting name
TWHAB This won't hurt a bit
TWIMC To whom it may concern
TWIU That's what I understand
TWYAS That's what you all say
TWYT That's what you think
TX Thanks
TY Thank you
TYCLO Turn your caps lock off (and stop shouting)
TYLE Took you long enough
TYT Take your time
TYVL,YWEL Thank you very little, You're welcome even less
TYVM Thank you very much

U

U You
U-OK Are you OK?
u/l Upload
UAE Unrecoverable application error
UAE Unrecoverable application error
UBD User brain damage
UCE Unsolicited commerical e-mail
UDS Ugly domestic scene
UFO Unidentified Flying (or) Falling Object
UGTBK You've got to be kidding
UKTR You know that's right
UL Upload
UNA Use no acronyms
unPC Unpolitically correct
U-OK Are you OK?
UR You are (or) your
URW You are welcome
URYY4M You are too wise for me
US You suck
USU Usually
UTC Under the counter;
(or) coordinated universal time
UTT Under the table
UV Unpleasant visual
UW You are welcome
UY Up yours

V

very big grin
VBEG Very big evil grin (usually )
VBG Very big grin
VBG Very big grin (usually )
VBSEG Very big sh*t eating grin
VC Venture capital
VEG Very evil grin
VES Very evil smile
VETLA Very enhanced TLA
VFM Value for money
VH Virtual hug
VM Voice mail
VPL Visible panty line
VR Virtual reality
VRBS Virtual reality bull sh*t
VT Virtual time
VWG Very wicked grin
VWS Very wicked smile

W

Wink
W/ With (usually just "w/")
W/O Without (usually just "w/o")
W8 Wait
W84M Wait for me
W8AM Wait a minute
W8ING Waiting
WAB? What, another bill?
WADR With all due respect
WAEF When all else fails
WAFWOT What a f**king waste of time
WAG Wild a*s guess
WAHM Work at home Mom
WAI What an idiot
WALOC What a load of cr*p
WAM Wait a minute
WAMBAM Web application meets brick and mortar
WAN2 Want to
WAN2TLK Want to talk
WASP White Anglo-Saxon Protestant
WATRUDOINLTR What are you doing later?
WAYF Where are you from?
WB Welcome back
WC Welcome
WCA Who cares anyway
WCAGA What comes around, goes around
WCTYBTWHTKY We could tell you,
but then we'd have to kill you
WDALYIC Who died and left you in charge?
WDF What da f**k?
WDYMBT What do you mean by that?
WDYS What did you say?
WDYT What do you think?
WE Whatever
WEFT Wrong every f**king time
WEG Wicked evil grin
WEHT Whatever happened to
WETSU We eat this sh*t up
WEU What's eating you?
WFM Works for me
WFO Wide full (or f**king) open
WG Wicked grin
WGAFF Who gives a flying f**k
WGAS Who gives a sh*t
WHAK With hugs and kisses
WIBAMU Well I'll be a monkey's uncle
WIBNI Wouldn't it be nice if
WIBNIF Wouldn't if be nice if...
WIFTAN Waste of f**king time and money
WIGAC When I get a chance
WIIFM What's in it for me?
WIIWD What it is we do
WILBI Wouldn't it be lovely if
WIMP Windows, icons, mouse pointing
WIT Wordsmith in training
WITFITS What in the f**k is this sh*t
WIZOP Wizard sysop
(the primary forum administrator)
WL Will
WMMOWS Wash my mouth out with soap
WMRS Write me real soon
WNDITWB We never did it this way before
WNOHGB Where no one has gone before
WOA Work of art
WOB Waste of bandwidth
WOFTAM Waste of flaming time and money
WOG Wise old guy
WOLF Witless one line followup
WOM Word of mouth
WOMBAT Waste of money, brains and time
WOT Waste of time
WOTAM Waste of time and money
WOWF Witless one word followup
WRATGAS Who really and truly gives a sh*t
WRK Work
WRT With regard to
WSD Willing suspension of disbelief
WT Without thinking
WT? What the...?? (or) Who the...??
WTB Want to buy
WTF What (or) who (or) where the f**k
WTFDIC What the f**k do I care
WTFDIK What the f**k do I know?
WTFDYTYA Who the f**k do you think you are
WTFIIWT_A What the f**k is it with these __ anyway?
WTFO What the f**k! Over!
WTFRU Who the f**k are you
WTFWT What the f**k was that
WTG Way to go!
WTGP? Want to go private?
WTH What the heck? (or) what the h*ll?
WTHDTM What the h*ll does that mean
WTMI Way too much information
WTMTOYH Way too much time on your hands
WTSDS Where the sun don't shine
WTTM Without thinking too much
WU What's up?
WUCIWUG What you see is what you get
WUF? Where are you from?
WUGAC When you get a chance
WWDWIIWD When we do what it is we do
WWJD What would Jesus do?
WWS Wife wants sex (please wait a tic)
WWW World-wide web
WWYC Write when you can
WYBMADIITY Will you buy me a double if I tell you?
WYGAC When you get a chance
WYGISWYPF What you get is what you pay for
WYGIWYG What you got is what you get
WYGIWYPF What you get is what you pay for
WYLABOCTGWTR Would you like a bowl of cream
to go with that remark?
WYLASOMWTC Would you like a saucer of milk
with that comment?
WYP What's your problem?
WYRN What's your real name?
WYS Whatever you say
WYSBANRTWYG What you see bears absolutely
no relation to what you get
WYSBYGI What you see before you get it
WYSIAYG What you see is all you get
WYSINEWYGBIC What you see is not exactly what
you get but it's close
WYSITWIRL What you see is totally worthless
in real life
WYSIWYG What you see Is what you get
WYSLPG What you see looks pretty good
WYSOH Where's your sense of humor?
WYT Whatever you think
WYTYSYDG What you thought you saw, you didn't get
WYWH Wish you were here

X Y Z

XLNT Excellent
XOXOXO Kisses and hugs
XYZ Examine your zipper
Y Why (or) yawning
Y2K Year 2000
Y3 Yadda yadda yadda
YA Yet another
YAA Yet another acronym
YABA Yet another bl**dy acronym
YABSA Yet another bl**dy stupid acronym
YAC Are you available to chat?
YACC Yet another calendar company
YADS Yet another DOS shell
YAFA Yet another fine acronym
YAFIYG You asked for it, you got it
YAFIYGI You ask for it, you get it
YANETU You are not expected to understand this
YAOTM Yet another off-topic message
YAP Yet another ploy
YAUN Yet another Unix nerd
YBS You'll be sorry
YBYSA You bet your sweet a*s
YCDBSO You can't do business sitting on your a*s!
YCDBWYCID You can't do business when
your computer is down!
YCHT You can have them
YCLIU You can look it up
YGBK You gotta be kidding
YGBKM You gotta be kidding me
YGBSM You gotta be sh*tting me
YGIAGAM Your guess is as good as mine
YGLT You're gonna love this
YGTBK You've got to be kidding
YGTBSM You've got to be sh*t-ing me!
YGTI You get the idea?
YGWYPF You get what you pay for
YHB_ You have been ____
YHBT You have been trolled
YHBW You have been warned
YHGASPL You have got a serious problem, lad!
YHGMTPO_ You have greatly misunderstood
the purpose of ____
YHL You have lost
YHTBT You had to be there
YIU Yes, I understand
YIWGP Yes, I will go private
YKIYEI You killed it, you eat it
YKWIM You know what I mean
YKYB You know you've been
YKYB_TLW You know you've been __ing too long when
YKYBHTLW You know you've been hacking to long when
YKYBOTLW You know you've been on-line too long when
YKYHB?TLW You know you have been ____ too long when
YL Young lady
YM You mean (or) young man
YMMV Your mileage may vary
YMMVG Your mileage may vary greatly
YNK You never know
YOYO You're on your own
YR Your (or) Yea, right. (Being sacastic)
YSS You suck severely
YSYD Yeah, sure you do
YTTT You telling the truth?
YVW You're very welcome
YW You're welcome (or) young woman
YWHOL Yelling "woohoo" out loud
YWIA You're welcome in advance
YWSYLS You win some, you lose some
YYSSW Yeah, yeah; sure, sure; whatever
ZZZ You're boring the heck out of me

Emoticons

:) or :-) happy

:-)) very happy

:( or :-( unhappy

;) or ;-) wink

:-D laughing

:-> hey (or) sarcastic

:'-) crying with joy

----------------------

:-( frowning, sad

:( sad

:-< very sad

:-c very unhappy

:-C very, very unhappy

&-| tearful

:' crying

:'-( crying and sad

:'-) Crying/Happy

:-| grim

:[ really low

:-[ pouting

:-ll angry

----------------------

;-) wink; just kidding

;-> sly wink

:-T keeping a straight face

:^D "I like it!"

8-] "Wow!"

:-o "Wow!" or "Shouting"

^5 high five

^ thumbs up

(::()::) bandaid (offer of help or support)

----------------------

:*) clowning around (or) drunk smiling face

:-{#} from a person with braces

:-7 user after a wry statement

:-w speak with forked tongue

:-r bleahh (sticking tongue out)

:-? licking your lips

------------------------

:-@ screaming

8-) wearing glasses

:-& tongue tied

() hug

:-x my lips are sealed

>:-( angry, mean

O:-) angel

:-p sticking out tongue (or) tongue in cheek

B-) wearing shades

:-D laughing

:-() talking to much

[:-) wearing a wig

:<> Amazed

:-, Hmmmm...,smirking

:-* kiss

:-X big kiss

<3 Love Heart

%-) confused

:o Ooooh,shocked

d8:) Cool Guy

:'-( Crying

:e Disappointed

:-).... Drooling face

:-O Surprised/shocked

&:-) From a person with curly hair

#:-) From a person with matted hair

|-) Getting tired, asleep

[-o yawning

[^O sleeping

{{name}} Hugs
{{{Name of Person}}} Hugging person